can't forget you, won't forget you

04

It's been two days, and I haven't spoken to Vince throughout those days.

How am I supposed to talk to my best friend after he kissed me?

It's going to be awkward and it was never like that before.

"Helena, you're going to be late for therapy!" My mom shouted from downstairs.

"Coming!" I called back to her.

I was wearing denim mom shorts with a black belt, a white fitted cropped top, and white sneakers. I decided to leave my curly hair down despite the hot weather. I grabbed my backpack then headed downstairs.

"Are you ready? I have to get to work now." My mom told me as she poured her coffee into her travel mug.

"Yeah. I'll bike there. Have a good day mom." I kissed her cheek then walked out the door.

I grabbed my bike and started to bike to the therapy center.

There's usually only a small group of us every meeting, but some come and go depending as to how long they have to stay. They make us tell our stories every time we go and give peer critiques. The therapist told us that the more times we tell our story, the easier it would be to grow towards acceptance and feeling better.

I think that's bullshit but it's whatever. I go because my mom forces me to.

I finally arrived, after making a quick Starbucks trip. I ended up being ten minutes late..

At least I came.

I locked my bike and walked into the building.

"Good morning, Pam." I waved to the receptionist. I started to sign myself into the book.

"Helena, good morning. A few minutes late, huh?" She raised her eyebrow.

I shook my Starbucks cup and she chuckled.

"Of course. Next time, bring me one." She winked and I chuckled.

"Will do." I dropped the pen and walked towards the door.

I walked into one of the girls, Olivia, telling her story. Everyone turned to me when they heard the door close.

"Sorry I'm late." I sounded embarrassed.

"No problem, Lena. Just glad you could make it with us." The therapist told me in a calm voice.

I sat down in an empty seat and put my backpack onto the ground.

I looked across from me and saw the boy next door, Micah.

My eyes widened, wondering as to why he's here. He noticed me as well as his eyebrow raised.

"Thank you Olivia for sharing with us." Dr. Elington said and the whole group snapped.

"Group, let us welcome our newest member, Micah." Dr. Elington added on.

"Welcome Micah." We all said in unison.

"Hey." He waved nervously.

"So Micah, if you don't mind, how about we learn about why you're here with us. This is a safe space and whatever you tell us will never leave this room." Dr. Elington had a small smile on her face, showing him that he could trust us.

"Uh, I've never done this before." He wiped his hands onto his pants.

"That's okay. Take your time." She nodded her head.

"Well, uh. I recently just moved here because of something that happened awhile ago and my parents just wanted to start new, you know?"

"What happened?" One of the guys, Steven, asked.

Steven tried to kill himself a few months ago, and he was told to come here from the mental hospital doctors.

It was his third attempt.

"So uh.. I never spoke about this out loud." Micah chuckled nervously.

A girl took his hand into hers to hold for a sense of security and to let him know she was there for him.

Her name is Katie, and she recently came out as gay but her parents kicked her out which led her towards drugs. She's now a recovering addict but her doctors at the rehab center recommend therapy.

As you could tell, this is group therapy for teens with any and all problems.

"A few months ago I came home earlier than my parents. My sister stood home from school that day because she said she felt sick." He stopped and tried his best to not cry.

"She was never sick, physically." He spoke out and my heart started to hurt for him.

"I called out her name but no response. I walk into her room and find her laying in her bed. Empty pill bottles laid next to her. She killed herself." A tear left his eye.

A moment of silence filled the room, until he began again.

"I hated her for it. I hated that she left me. She was my best friend. I wanted to find out why, but then again I wish I didn't."

"Why did she do it?" Steven asked him.

"She was raped by four different guys at the same time while she was unconscious at a party." He started to cry a bit harder now.

"I'm so sorry." I spoke out from across him.

His eyes met mine and I could see the pain in them.

"What happened to the guys?" Katie asked.

"One of them recorded the whole thing and sent it out around school after she died. People still mocked her after she was gone. They called her a slut and whore. I got ahold of the footage and showed the cops what they did. She even wrote about it in her note." He looked to the floor.

"What was her name, Micah." Dr. Elington asked him.

"Camilla." Another tear left his eye.

"Today we mourn the loss of beloved Camilla. Thank you Micah for sharing. We're all here for you." Dr. Elington shared with a supportive smile.

Everybody snapped for him.

I continued to look at him throughout the rest of the meeting, wondering as to who he is as a person.

"Seems like our hour and a half is up. Thank you all for coming. I will see you all next week." Dr. Elington said as she stood up, ready for our end of session hug.

We all group hugged and then slowly started to leave. I saw Micah walking towards the door and I decided to go to him.

I tapped his shoulder and he turned around to me.

"Hey girl next door. What's up?" He sounded chill.

"Do you want to go get food and hang out?" I asked shyly.

"Why not?" He shrugged. "Where are we going?"

We both started to walk towards where my bike is parked.

"I hope you're a fan of diner food." I chuckled.

"Who isn't?" He said as if it was a stupid question.