Lost Minds

43

Again, audacity.

"And why would I do that?" I cross my arms to hide the shaking in my hands.

If he had asked to begin with, I would've said yes. I would've done anything he wanted me to. But I guess that's just how well he had me wrapped around his pinky.

"You're a victim of Brian's too, so we should do this together." Maddy says her hopeful smile meeting my dead stare.

"So now you guys are asking to use me? Instead of just doing it anyway? Is that because I found out about all of this and you don't want your precious blackmail to run away?" I ask, looking back over at Daxon.

"Yes, that's exactly why. So agree because you have no other option." Daxon says, his tone flat, staring at me with the same darkness he had in his eyes that day.

So we really done, huh? He was reminded of why he should hate me and now he does.

Fuck Daxon. And fuck everyone else.

"I could leave right now, or even maybe hit up Brian. That'd be fun. I could expose you and have all of you locked up." I state, as the mood in the room shifts.

Ah, so this is what they actually feel towards me.

This malice in the air, they consider me an enemy if I'm not on their side. There's no leaving this room, they'd probably kill me before I even have the chance to run.

Fine. I'm so tired of all of this.

"I'm just kidding. How could I ever leave you guys? My friends?" I smile, as each of them avoid eye contact.

At least they know this is fucked up.

"God. This is the worse I've ever felt in my life." Scarlet whispers.

"Scar, don't-" Rick starts.

"No, Naomi was a breath of fresh air around here. We would all wallow in our trauma but someone outside that being here, felt like the world was so much bigger than just us and our problems. Naomi doesn't deserve the pain were forcing her to go through. Why are we spreading our own problems to someone who could've maybe lived a normal life?" Scar continues. I only watch as tears fall down her cheeks.

Scar. I guess she feels guilty.

Good.

"Scar's right. Naomi has sat in her apartment wasting away and I feel like we are asking so much of her. We might as well be kidnappers at this point." Maddy adds, her own tears, racing down her face.

They feel bad. That means near nothing to be at this point. Would they help me escape if I asked?

I just want to get away from all of this.

There's no one in this world left to trust.

"If you're done stating the obvious, I'll head back to mine." I begin to get up until a hand grabs mine.

"You're not going anywhere. I need my eyes on you 24/7 so you'll be sleeping in my room." Daxon says, tightening his hold on my wrist.

"Daxon. You're going too far." Matteo speaks up.

"What? Would you prefer she sleeps in your room?" He asks, his tone a bit off.

Matteo glares at him, rolling his eyes and leaving the room.

"Daxon. I don't want to see your face. I just want to go back to my couch." I say, trying to relax.

He doesn't love me. He doesn't trust me. He doesn't even see me anymore. He sees Brian.

"I don't care, Naomi. You belong to me until the press conference." He states, getting up and dragging me down the hallway.

"You can't be serious." I say, as he throws me in his room.

"I am." He shuts the room behind him and we sit in silence.

"Naomi." He suddenly speaks up. I lay upon his bed, staring at the wall.

"You should forget about our kiss."

A surge of emotion threatens to overtake me. I swallow.

"What kiss?"

"...good. It would like spitting in my parents grave if we were to go any further. I forgot what this was all for, for a moment. We'll never be lovers-" I cut him off, unable to hold back anymore.

"I don't care! Why are you saying this when I already fucking said I don't care?! I can't hear this. I don't want to hear this! I hate you! I hate every single one of you for making me believe in you. But most of all, I hate myself for falling for all of your lies. I even fell for you, Daxon...but none of that matters now. All I want to do is be alone." I scream, the tears I'd held back so long, running down my cheeks like rivers. Daxon looks over at me and then quickly away again.

"Naomi, I-" He swallows, shaking his head.

"I'm glad you understand. I'll let you have a second." He gets up and leaves, shutting the door behind him.

Sobs rack through me as the ocean of emotion in my heart, floods out, wave by wave, drowning me in my own misery. 

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sad or whattttt????

How do you guys feel? 

ciao.