𝑯𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒂 𝑩𝒖𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒍𝒚 ~ Stu Macher & Billy Loomis

It's The Millennium

After school, Randy went to work at his job, the video store. He was currently stocking shelves when someone came behind him, dropping the movies out of his hands.

"Oh!" Stu laughs. He goes on the other side of the shelve across from Randy.

"Dork." Randy retorts.

"Jesus, this place is packed tonight, man." The dirty blonde said.

"We had a run in the mass murder section." Randy explained.

"What's that werewolf movie with E.T.'s mom in it?" A blonde girl walked up and asked the boy.

"The Howling. Horror. Straight ahead." Randy pointed to the horror section.

"Okay, thanks." The girl left.

Randy looked in that direction and saw someone he was starting to dislike. "Oh, now that's in poor taste."

"What?" Stu asked, looking in the direction his friend was staring at. They both saw Billy a few aisles down talking to some kids from school.

"If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath, would you be standing in the horror section?" Randy said to Stu who was leaning over the shelve.

"What? It was just a misunderstanding. He didn't do anything." Stu defended his partner in crime.

"You're such a little lap dog. He's got 'killer' printed all over his forehead." The boy exclaimed. Not understanding how no one but him sees that Billy has the traits to be Ghostface.

"Oh-kay! Really?" Stu said in a goofy voice. He walked towards Randy asking, "Well, why'd the cops let him go, smart guy?"

"Because obviously, they don't watch enough movies. This is standard horror movie stuff. Prom Night revisited, man." The slasher nerd explained.

Stu propped his head on top of his hand saying, "Yeah? Why would he wanna kill his own girlfriend? Or Rory of all people?"

Everyone knows Billy's with Sidney, so why would he bring harm to his girlfriend. But also, people who have eyes can see how much Billy is around Rory. Why would he ever hurt her?

"There's always some stupid, bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend or best friend. That's the beauty of it all. Simplicity. Besides, if it gets too complicated, you lose your target audience." Randy stated.

"Well, what's his reason?" Stu asked.

"Maybe Sidney wouldn't have sex with him. And as for Rory...I'm still trying to figure it out."

"What, is she savin' herself for you?" Stu laughed.

"Maybe. Now that Billy tried to mutilate her, do you think Sid would go out with me?" Randy asked hopefully. He had a crush on the girl but also had a crush on his horror friend Rory. He liked them both and would be happy if either one would give him a chance.

Stu immediately shut him down by laughing in his face. He then got serious and said, "No, I don't at all. No. You know who I think it is? You know, I think it's her father. Why can't they find her pops, man?"

"Because he's probably dead. His body will come poppin' up in the last reel somewhere! Eyes gouged out, fingers cut off, teeth knocked out! See, the police are always off track with this shit." Randy raised his voice in frustration.

Stu noticed most of the store staring at him and tried to get his friend to quiet down. "Come on, man!"

Randy continued, not caring, "If they'd watch Prom Night, they'd save time. There's a formula to it. A very simple formula! Everybody's a suspect!"

The whole store now staring at the stressed boy. Stu put his hands to his mouth like he was smoking a blunt, indicating to the people staring that his friend was just high and paranoid.

"I'm telling you, the dad's a red herring. It's Billy." Randy turned around but was met with Billy grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. Randy's eyes instantly widened from fear.

"How do we know you're not the killer? Huh?" Billy asked the scared boy.

Stu came behind Randy, resting his arms on his shoulders, with his hands behind the boy's neck. "Hi, Billy." Randy said scared.

"Maybe your movie-freaked mind lost its reality button. You ever think of that?" Billy growled out.

"You're absolutely right. I'm the first to admit it. If this were a scary movie, I'd be the prime suspect." Randy rambled out of nervousness of what the crazed boy in front of him would do.

"That's right. And what would be your motive?" Stu asked playing with the scared boy's earlobe.

"It's the millennium," Randy shrugged Stu off him, "Motives are incidental."

" 'Millennium.' Hmm. 'Millennium.' I like that. That's good. That's the millennium." Billy said, pinching Randy's nose. He patted the boy's face, "Good kid. Oh, and I'm sure you'll let me borrow this right?" Billy showed the movie that was in his hands. "I hear you always let Rory off the hook and since I'm watching this with her tonight, I'm sure you'll let me off the hook, right?"

Stu's head popped up at the name of the girl. Billy didn't even give Randy the chance to answer as he walked away.

" 'Millennium.' Good word, my man." Stu boasted, trying to hide his jealousy that his friend was going to spend time with Rory.

"Now, you're telling me that's not a killer?" Randy pointed at Billy from across the store. Still trying to say he's the perfect person to fit that description.

Stu only laughed, patting his friend on the shoulder before leaving to catch up with Billy who was about to leave the store. "Where are you going in such a rush?"

Billy turned to Stu with a growing smirk. "To Rorys."

Stu walked closer to the brunette and whispered, "That's not a part of the plan, man."

Billy's smirk only grew, noticing his friend's jealousy and anger. "I know, but she wanted to make me feel better, so..."

Stu's face only grew more agitated. "What do you mean, make you feel better? What are you going to do?"

The brunette only chuckled, "Nothing, man. And hey, maybe if you spend a night in jail, she'll want to hang with you too. Maybe."

Billy walked out of the store with a smirk on his face, while Stu was left standing angry.

Stu was worried that his friend might make a move on the girl he loves. He knew they were supposed to share, but Stu wanted to be Rory's first kiss, not Billy. But he knew he couldn't interfere, Billy would only get upset and when he's upset, he's knife happy. Stu just prayed Billy wouldn't make a move on the girl.