Picture This (Niall Horan Trilogy)

-We died a paper death, not an emotional one [Chapter 81]

Ashley's POV:

“I’M HEEERE!”

Mallory’s chirpy voice screeched through the keyhole. I smiled as I picked myself up from the sofa and rushed to the door flinging it open to reveal a bright eyed Mallory who instantly flung her arms around me pushing me further inside as I closed the door behind her.

“Oh my god Ashley why didn’t you tell me you were living in an apartment like this?!”

She gushed looking like a little kid in a sweet shop as she took everything in, the crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling, the expensive paintings and luxury sofas and the huge grandfather clock by the fire.

“I told you it was nice!”

“I thought you had a good vocabulary nice is an understatement!”

She exclaimed running to the bedroom and flinging the door open I could hear her gushing as she took everything in there in.

“Ash?”

She called rather seriously. Wondering what the matter was I abandoned the pans on the stove and made my way to the bedroom.

“Got…Got something to tell me or?”

She said gesturing to the picture of Niall and I on my wall. I sighed as I looked at the picture for about the billionth time since I got here.

“What do you mean? It’s just a picture.”

“Just a picture…but it’s a picture of you and Niall. Your ex…”

“Don’t say that.”

“What? Ex? But it’s true. You wouldn’t exactly put a picture of Luke up there would you?”

“That’s different.”

“How is it? He and Niall are both ex’s”

She persisted. For once Mallory decides to be serious and it’s on a subject such as this. God hates me.

“Because…I don’t love him.”

I mumbled. She widened her eyes raising her eye-brows at me.

“What did you just say?”

“I said that I don’t love Luke.”

“So are you saying…you still love Niall?”

I chewed on my lower lip. I thought she knew. I thought most people I know. I mean, I haven’t gone a day since without crying at least once since it’s really quite shocking actually and I just feel more pathetic every day that someone could be that important to me that without them I feel like nothing.

“Maybe.”

I muttered attempting to busy myself and make this conversation seem as casual as possible while turning my back from her and re-arranging my nail polishes on the shelf. I couldn’t see her expression but I imagined her doing that ridiculously irritating smirk crossed with a sympathetic smile. I never knew how she did that, mashed pity and annoyance into one but she did and it was damn annoying.

“Did you just say maybe?”

“Are you deaf?”

“No, but apparently you are.”

“I can hear you just fine.”

“But you can’t hear the callings of luurrve telling you that you need to tell Niall you love him still. It’s been over a month Ashley; don’t you think he deserves to know?”

“Just because he deserves to know it defiantly doesn’t mean I’m going to tell him. Do you have any idea how awkward that would be? And I couldn’t do it besides we haven’t spoken since. You know what I said to him that night, I can’t just turn around and tell him I broke up with him on a load of bull shit, do you have any idea how much a bitch I would sound?”