i sleep naked ➸ larry stylinson

twenty two

Trigger Warning: Self-Harm

it was dark.

the kind of dark that when you opened your eyes, nothing would change. where you could only see your hand if you held it right to your face, the kind of dark that was eerie yet strangely comforting.

it helped with the fact that he could barely breathe, due to his spinning mind and heavy sobbing.

harry hoped that niall hadn't followed him all the way here.

he ran home. he ran and now his muscles were burning and there was mucus in his throat but he didn't have time to get a drink.

it was very late when he had finally arrived home, but all he could think about was that he wanted to hide and he wanted to scream and be really alone.

who knew the darkness under his own bed would be the solution.

the carpet beneath his elbows was starting to hurt, as was his neck because he was hunched over quite a bit in the small space.

harry had turned off all the lights and closed the blinds, making sure that he could see no light, then he had crawled under his bed, careful not to hit his head. and then he cried, he cried so hard that no matter how many times he wiped away his tears they would still keep coming, and he was hiccupping and choking but he couldn't even get a word out, if he wanted to.

and he was under there for about an hour or so, until even the crickets stopped chirping and he heard a car door slam from the driveway, which harry automatically assumed was his mum. so he hesitantly climbed out from underneath his small bad and stretched his aching muscles.

it was just as dark as before, and the only noise was his fan blowing softly and the sound of footsteps outside.

harry's eyes widened and his heart stopped when he realised that his mum was sleeping in her bed tonight.

she was already home.

and what scared him even more was the quiet tap on his window, and he let out a whimper, shooting away from the window and hiding behind the other side of his bed.

of course. right when his tears had finally dried he had to start crying again, but now it was because he was horrified and scared and somebody was outside his window.

"harry? i know you're in there."

harry didn't know whether to sigh in relief or throw a brick.

but he walked over to the window, his eyes wide, and opened it.

the boy on the other side looked surprised, and his blue eyes shone incredibly pale and beautiful and his hair was incredibly messy and there were tear stains on his tan cheeks.

"i know it's one in the morning, but i couldn't take it," he sighed, biting his lip, and harry backed away from him, lowering his eyes to the ground and trying not to break down into tears.

"and i also know that you aren't going to forgive me, heck, you shouldn't, but i was hoping this would help." louis held up a light green book, the color of harry's eyes, and it was pretty much falling apart and there was sloppy handwriting on the front. "don't look at it now, look at it when i leave." but that sentence didn't make much sense when louis climbed through the window and landed on the floor next to harry.

"i want you to leave now," harry said quietly. "i wish you weren't even here. i wish you would just leave and never speak to me again."

the hurt was clear and painful on louis' face as he took a step back, his lip trembling.