Part 33

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"When I first came to Beacon Hills, I came because the Dread Doctors asked me too. I didn't have a choice. They saved my life, and they could take it away from me, too. Wait, no. The reason I had to k-kill Tara was because, like I said, the Dread Doctors asked me to. They saved me from my abusive parents, so of course I thought that I had forever owed them. My parents always called me a fuck-up because of my heart disease. It was a rare type called Brugada Syndrome. Terminal, to say the least. But you already knew that because you're a nurse, but anyway. All I've ever wanted was to stay alive. A-and so when three people showed up at my f-front door in masks, saying that m-my sister wanted me to have her heart, I believed them!

So that's that out of the way. Anyways, when I came to Beacon Hills, it was simply because the Dread Doctors wanted me to.I wanted to prove to them that I wasn't the failure they thought I was, and so I tried my best to listen to their every instruction.

That resulted me in hurting a lot of the people that you're close to, and so for that, I am sorry.

Obviously, after that, I was sent to hell, where I had to endure days, and weeks, of my sister ripping my heart out. On repeat, she never stopped.I'd wake up in a morgue at the hospital, bust my way out. Then I'd be in a corridor, her voice calling my name like it used to when we played hide and seek. She's then appear in front of me on all fours, her sking ghostly white, her ribs coming out of her body, a hole where her heart was supposed to be.

She's pin me against a wall and I'd have to tell her, 'It's okay, you don't have to stop' because it's true, she didn't. I deserve every bad thing in this world. 

That's all that happened to me whilst I was under the ground, ad every night I still see her, in the same situation. The nightmares won't just go away. Maybe you have something that can help that, though who am I to tell you to help me. 

When Liam let me out, his was the first face I saw. I had always liked him, but I knew that he would never return the feelings because I had hurt so many of the people that he had loved. And so I pushed away the feelings and left, sleeping in my car across town for 3 weeks.

The pack never learned to trust me again, which doesn't suprise me. I'd get a lot of hate on social media from people at school who found out that I was homeless. I developed depression and anorexia. I haven't told anyone since, because I overcame them on my own.

It's nice to have someone to talk to, ya know?

That's when Liam found me. I was scared, waking up with the boy I had a crush on in jy car, driving me to his house. But I felt safe in his company, and so I let him. 

We only got closer in the following weeks, however, and I managed to build a family around me who could break down my walls and get to see the real me. We always had each toher's backs, me, Derek, Lydia and Liam. They'd always comfort me from my nightmares, or when me and Liam fell out. I always knew I'd have a shoulder to cry on.

Me and Liam are kind of like an unlabelled relationship. We kiss, hold hands, cuddle, all of that love stuff.

He told me he loved me, and I couldn't find the courage to say it back to him, but he told me he understood. And so there we were, happy and in a good head space. Or more like, I was in a good head space. I'm not sure about him anymore.

He asked me to come over here earlier on. I was a little hesitant at first, because the pack as a whole had caused me to have so many mental illnesses and I would hate to have to go down that path all over again. It was horrific. Although, obviously, I agreed to come in the end.

I didn't mind no one talking to me at first. I felt a little bit left out, but that was okay because I had been through worse.

And then, when Mason and Corey came along and tackled me to the ground, they did the worst thing possible. They gave me hope.

It took me a few hours to realise that I wasn't wanted here. I think that people forget that I'm a chimera with supernatural hearing sometimes, because I could hear them whispering about me. None of my friends d-did anything t-to stop them, either. 

And so, I sat in the corner, shutting everyone out. I could see Liam and Derek looking at me, worried. But I didn't care, since they never questioned it and just acted like they had seen the wall, instead of me.

After that, I spent time watching each person individually. I had nothing else better to do, since everyone was acting like I didn't exist. They sat there, talking, eating pizza, laughing. 

I watched Lydia first. She hadn't spoken to me since we walked through the front door. She was sat there, her arms around Allison's waist , feeding her pizza. She had the biggest smile on her face, and it looked so real. She seemed so happy, she doesn't look like that when she's with me.

Then, I turned my attention to Derek. And there he was, cuddling Stiles, the boy he adores with all of his heart. His smile seemed so genuine, it was almost as though he was an angel. I could just about see a halo. Again, he never looked that happy when he hung out with me.

Liam found a thousand ways to break my heart. It was unintentional, of course. But the sparkle in his ocean eyes lit the room, it wouldn't have been the same pack meeting if he wasn't there. His beautiful blonde hair was messy from everyone ruffling it. That was our special thing, but I guess there isn't an 'our' anymore. His smile reminded me of the sun, blinding and bright. It almost fixed my heart, almost.

I'm really trying to not sound jealous, because I'm not. I'm just upset that I can't have what they have. I'll get over myself soon enough. I just need some time to think.

And so, Melissa, I have come to a conclusion. People in Beacon Hills are better off without me. They seem happier, truer to themselves. And I don't know if I'm making all of this up and just not seeing the smiles on their faces when their with me, but it seems like this is for the best.

Tomorrow, I want you to do me a favour. I want you to call Liam over, so that I can pack my stuff up. Don't feel guilty about it, this is all on me.

I hope they miss me, I really do. Who knows, maybe I might come back sooner than you anticipate. 

Make sure you stay in touch with me. You have my number by now, I'm sure. You were the mother I never had, Melissa, and I appreciate you more than anything else in this world.

And so on that note, this is my goodbye. Not forever, just for the moment. You could even call it a see you later. So, see you later, mum."

"See you soon, Theodore Raeken."

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a/n

so I had to rewrite the second half bc wattpad deleted it. 

I actually prefer this version to the other one tbh 

ily all, theo will be back


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