c h a p t e r. 18

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"The world is always greater than your desires; plenty is never enough." -Aleksandar Hemon

chapter 18

Sometimes, when Jazz thinks he's alone, he'll make weird noises just to see what they look like. He'll flick pencils at walls or pull the straps onto his backpack as tight as they would go just to see the sharp teal that the sound makes.

He likes the edgy lavender that the drip, drip, drips of the coffee makes whenever it's getting poured into his cup and the awkward silver that the clank of the door closing greets him with every afternoon. The burning orange of his breathing and the hue of blue that surrounds his hands when he taps tunes onto his desk are familiar and comforting.

His whole world is surrounded in colors and music and excitement.

But, lately, he's beginning to enjoy something a little calmer.

Castor's voice is a soft, ethereal color that never fails to mesmerize and his growl-- one of the more adorable tics-- is a deep color, not quite blue but not anything else. He was just... green, so so green.

Jazz has always loved green.

It symbolized life and love and everything he held dear; his mother's eyes and soft hum, his father's deep voice, his favorite mug, and his twin's cheerful smile and sisters' double-edged laugh, Viv's snore and the welcoming sheets of his bed.

Green was safe.

And so was Castor.

The celestial was safe; he was thoughtful and kind and he knew, without judging, how to always make him calm. He was mint and pine and all good things in life. He is purpose.

And Jazz is in love with him.

It might be a little early-- and yeah, they probably skipped a couple steps here or there-- but it felt right. Besides, there was no handbook, no rules, no checklist that said how and when he should fall in love.

A big part of falling in love, then realizing he's in love, is mild panic and waiting.

Right Jazz was experiencing both of those things.

Castor was out on a run, the musician having had a morning lecture that he couldn't skip to join him and now was just laying down on their kitchen floor, long legs propped up by the counter but head flat on the tile as he fiddled with his guitar, waiting to eat the oranges next to him to share with the celestial.

Who he was going to ask out on a date.

Which is why he also brought home a strawberry milkshake (and fresh strawberries) which was now in the fridge and some twizzlers, the strawberry flavored ones because Castor was allergic to the black licorice and ate those ones just to spite people because the red ones weren't dangerous for him.

Basically, Jazz had no fucking idea how to ask someone out or how to do it in a way that his star would appreciate, so he just bought him a bunch of his favorite flavored stuff and hoped that, even if he didn't get a date, Cas would appreciate that.

Either way, he'd probably get cuddles.

Which is a definite win in his books.

Hearing the front door unlock and push open, Jazz's fingers paused on his guitar strings, cutting off the sound with a violet thwang! of the higher notes as he looked up and met the celestial's eyes.

"Castor!" He happily wiggled in his spot, a broad grin pulling at his mouth and making his snake bites-- he had a bunch and matched the colors to whatever shirt he was wearing for the day, right now they were deep greens that made his eyes pop-- sink further into his lip.

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