When Sanity is Lost

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And I feel as if I'm sailing dangerous waters if he too is in love.It is myself the man that scares me but trust because therefore he is myself but toxic and acidic he is to new heights but I guess in some ways their betterThe moment you stare at the candle light knowing better than to watch your skin burn, but what if it helps the burning down of myself I do inside? How pleasurable the mistakes on the stove, wondering if I can keep such addiction to accidental infliction.Temperamental avoidance, due to my own sour thoughts, what is it that that makes one happy,Wondering now why you only think about me, don't you understand, don't you know, it seems like your company is often my only smiles with unthought grace.I just don't know what to do about it as tears float into my eyes, praying at whatever might help sooth my anxieties. Threatening like winter skies, Sooth the hearts and their broken homes, relieve them from the dark, and bring them to brighter days. Let them find comfort in those accompanying souls, and let them all be see through and true.It is some days, that it scared him how much of a heart beat, that has been brought back, I'm not sure if I could give him the term heartless back, but it's scares even me, the first time he's been concerned about not wanting to get lost, the moments that I fear, when he panics on how that the mess will go away, what I can not yet change, thinking how could one ever stand the sight.How much it hurts to think that for some reason you could never quite completely stand me, aren't I annoy, inconsistent, or is it the fact that there is at times moments of such self criticism that tears me into an ever ready flood gate, and possibly even hate for what I try to be so patient and stand, with no clue on how you ever could.- Joshua Banks JJAJ