Separation

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Noah

I woke up the next morning to the sound of my phone ringing.

"Hello?"

"Morning sunshine," Chloe's very awake voice greeted me.

"You are aware there's a three hour time difference, right?"

"Yes, but it's 10am here so stop your whinging. Besides, I couldn't wait any longer to find out how your talk with Elle went."

"It went...unexpectedly well."

"How well?" Chloe's voice was suspicious now.

"Not that well," I chuckled. "I wasn't aiming for that."

"Well that's good. I think."

"Yeah I think so too." I genuinely was happy about how things ended up last night with Elle. After the hug we'd walked back to the car and the drive back to her house had been comfortable, with a little bit of our previously normal banter.

"Well now you just have to not stuff it up tonight."

"Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, Clo."

"Sorry mate, but you do have spectacularly bad form when it comes to keeping things on an even keel with Elle."

She wasn't wrong, but I didn't really want to think about it.

"Yeah, okay. Fair point. I'll be on my best behaviour."

"Excellent. Well off you go, then. Go run off some of that nervous energy I'm sure you've got going."

Now that I was awake and thinking about tonight, I did in fact have some energy to burn off.

"Will do, talk later."

"Bye ugly."

Chloe hung up and I got dressed and went for that run.

When I got back to the house, I made straight for the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water out and downing half of it in a couple of gulps. I heard voices and footsteps coming down the stairs and Lee entered the kitchen, followed by a pretty blonde who I assumed must be Alyssa.

"Hey man, happy birthday," I said, giving him a sweaty hug.

"Thanks, but also, eww. You need a shower, stat."

"And you must be the poor girl my brother has somehow convinced to date him," I smirked, turning to Alyssa.

She laughed and stuck out her hand. "Guilty as charged. I'm Alyssa."

I shook her hand. "Noah."

"Anyway," Lee said, looking at me like I was a live grenade, "how's things?"

"Fine. Why?"

"You know why," he said, raising one eyebrow.

"It was fine Lee, really." I knew he was referring to me driving Elle home last night, but the fact he had to ask meant that Elle had not called him afterwards. Interesting.

Lee let out the breath he'd been holding. "So does that mean you're going to be here for the party tonight?"

"Yeah, of course. Wouldn't miss it." I grabbed an apple and went upstairs to take that shower.

Standing under the spray of hot water, I thought about what Lee had asked, about being there tonight. I guess it wasn't really a given. I'd managed to miss a couple of their parties in the last few years through my own stupidity. Just another regret I'd have to live with, I guess. I promised myself I wasn't going to do anything stupid to ruin this one.

I'd just finished getting dressed when I heard a knock at the door. "It's me," Mom's voice called.

"Come in," I sighed, sitting down on the bed.

"Morning honey."

"Morning Mom."

She came to sit next to me. This was usually a sign that I was about to be interrogated or given a lecture. I didn't think I'd done anything that warranted either of those, to be honest.

"So," she began, smoothing the blanket, "Lee told me last night that you offered to go pick up Elle."

"Yes, that's true. I wasn't about to leave her hanging."

"And?" Mom asked pointedly.

"And it was fine. I took the opportunity to say some things I'd wanted to for a long time. Elle said some things back and in the end, we hugged. Nobody cried, nobody yelled. All is okay." The details of that conversation were nobody's business but our own.

Mom looked at me closely, searching my face like she was looking for some sign that there was more to the story. Finally she said, "Okay, good. I'm glad you finally cleared the air."

She got up to leave and I was so surprised I couldn't help but ask, "That's it?"

Mom turned back with a questioning smile on her face, "Does there need to be more?"

I was so taken aback, I sputtered, "Uh, no."

"Well then, that's it." She turned away and walked out the door.

What the hell? I shook my head and smiled. Somehow my mother remains a bit of a mystery to me, even now.

I took my bike out for a ride to avoid having to play errand boy all day and really opened it up along the coast road. I end up in Santa Barbara and grab some lunch at the wharf before wandering aimlessly through town. Something catches my eye in the window of a jewellery store. It's a silver bracelet, with a single charm hanging from it. A shell.

I chuckle and wonder for a second if it's too much. But then I think it's got just the right amount of joke factor to be downplayed if need be. I go into the store and buy it before I can second guess myself anymore. On the ride back home I lift my face to the sun, closing my eyes for a second, breathing in the sea air, enjoying a moment of pure happiness.

We have a family dinner before the party starts in earnest and when the Evanses arrive I'm surprised that Elle's boyfriend isn't with them. Maybe he's just coming to the party later. Regardless, I take the opportunity while he's not there to avoid any awkwardness and give Elle her gift. She blushes when I hand it to her after dinner. "Thanks. You really didn't have to get me anything."

"Elle, it's your birthday, of course I was going to get you a present. Besides, don't thank me until you open it," I smirk.

Her reaction when she opens the box is everything I could've hoped for. First she bursts out laughing and then looks up and me and says, "I love it, thank you."

"Happy Birthday Shelly." I give her a quick hug and then head into the kitchen to help Mom bring out the cakes.

Of course my mother's eagle eyes have missed none of my little exchange with Elle and as I take the stack of plates from her, she smiles at me gently. "I missed you. This you," she says gesturing to me and then towards Elle briefly.

I lean down and kiss Mom on the forehead. "I missed it too."

The party is in full swing and there are plenty of people from school to catch up with to keep me amused. I've overheard enough conversations now to have figured out that Elle actually doesn't have a boyfriend anymore but that my presence is stopping anyone from hitting on her tonight. I can't help but be a little bit happy about that, but I'm wondering why she didn't mention it last night. I brush the thoughts aside though in the spirit of being on my best behaviour and just enjoy the party.

The rest of the summer passes in a bit of a blur, with me spending most of my time working at my internship downtown. But there are weekends of catching up with friends, surfing and lying on the beach. I get to know Alyssa more since she and Lee have set themselves up at the beach house and sometimes Elle's there too. In the best moments it feels like the start of that summer, before it all went so wrong. But I don't push it. For the first time in far too long, things between me and Elle are good. And so I tell myself to enjoy that and not waste the time wishing it was better.

Back in Boston I feel more homesick than I have for awhile. Maybe it's because what's there now is happiness rather than heartbreak that I feel the separation so keenly.

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