Preservation

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Elle

June is checking in with me as she does from time to time. I probably haven't put on a very convincing act the last few times we've spoken. As much as I'm getting on with life and enjoying my classes here, the isolation is hard. And then of course, there's the regret and overwhelming guilt. Which I haven't spoken to anyone about. But June is just about the last person I would share that information with.

"So Christmas is coming up...." June says, breaking me out of my daze.

"Yeah, it should be fun to maybe have a white Christmas for once." I try to put some brightness in my voice. It really would be cool to have snow at Christmas time after spending all my years in the California sunshine.

"Well have you got any plans?"

"Uh, some friends here have asked me if I want to go home to Edinburgh with them for the holidays but I'm not sure."

"Ok, well I'm sure you'll have fun. I'm sending you a special package. Hopefully it should get there next week."

"Awww you didn't have to do that."

"No, I think I really did. Besides, I wanted to."

"Well thank you in advance, I'm sure I'll love it."

"Yeah, I think you will."

We say our goodbyes soon after and I go back to studying for my exams.

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What a relief! I'd just finished my last exam for the semester and was headed back to my dorm to fall onto my bed and maybe not leave it for a week. I'd turned down my classmates offers for celebratory drinks at the pub and was walking carefully on the icy footpath, watching my feet.

I look up when I get near my building, seeing a person sitting on the stoop, so bundled up against the cold I can barely make out their face. That is until they push the hood of their jacket back and smile at me. "Hey Shelly."

"Lee!!! What are you doing here?"

"I'm your special present. Mom wanted to put a bow on me, but I managed to get out of that part."

"Oh my god!" I forget about trying to avoid ice and Lee barely has time to stand up before I barrel into him, burying my face in his chest, my arms wrapping around him tightly. He hugs me back, resting his head against mine.

"So you did miss me then?" Lee jokes.

"Just a little bit," I smile.

"I missed you too, Elle."

We stand there for a minute and then I pull back, looking at him. "Lee, how long are you here for?"

"Geez, trying to get rid of me already?" I punch him on the shoulder. "Well bad luck, you're stuck with me for two whole weeks."

"So you're going to be here for Christmas? And New Year? Oh my god, yay!!!" I have a sudden thought. "Oh no. Lee."

"What?"

"I've already posted your Christmas present. It's probably somewhere over the Atlantic right now."

Lee chuckles. "I'm sure I'll survive, Elle. Right now I'll settle for getting inside and having a cup of coffee because it is freaking freezing out here! How do you do this everyday?"

I laugh and drag him inside. "You get used to it."

"Really?"

"No."

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