A Soldier I Will Be | Destiel and Sabrifer |

Deep-Rooted Hatred

It had taken ten minutes for the police force to show up after Dean had radioed them. Castiel barely even noticed the wail of the sirens, or the flashing lights, as his mind was elsewhere, rooted deep inside his thoughts, where he could see nothing but the last few moments of Mike's life playing over and over again in his head.

Dean had tried to comfort him, but Castiel didn't feel anything but a numbness that had spread from his chest outwards. It was as if he could no longer feel any emotion, but he knew that wasn't true, there was tiny hint of pain flaring in his chest. He knew the minute the numbness disappeared, it would come back full force.

As the men made their way over to Castiel and Dean, the flare slowly began to get bigger, and the black-haired Novak began to whimper, tears beginning to well in his eyes. A hole was opening up in his heart, and the whimpers quickly became sobs as he began to feel again, the tears spilling from his lids and making tracks down his face.

It was when they removed Mike's body from his arms that Castiel let a scream rip through his throat. He tried reaching for Mike, feeling as if he didn't, he would have to accept the fact that Mike was gone, and never coming back.

Dean grabbed him and pulled him back, holding Castiel tightly against his body as the black-haired Novak struggled. It took several minutes and calming words and touches to get him to stop, but Castiel finally slumped, only remaining on his feet because the Winchester was there.

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Three hours later and the husbands were back at home, Sam and Gabriel over as well, trying to comfort the mourning men. Castiel had spent the entire time crying on the bed, clutching onto his pillow as if it were his life line as Gabriel tried to vainly comfort him. Nothing was making it any easier.

"Why him?" Castiel cried, feeling Gabriel's hand still for just a moment. "Why did they have to kill him?"

"Who killed him, Cas? Do you know who did it?" Gabriel asked, all his usual playfulness gone from his voice. It only seemed to darken Castiel's mood, knowing that even Gabriel couldn't smile. It made him lose his will to hope.

"T-the Angels. The pendant." Castiel mumbled into the fluffy form of the pillow, shakily holding out his hand that hadn't been opened since he had picked up the object. He felt Gabriel take the pendant before a growl left his younger brother's throat.

"The bastards." Gabriel hissed softly, but a sniff from Castiel made him forget about his anger for a while. He pressed his hand back on Castiel's back, moving in the same comforting movement as he had earlier, until Castiel cried himself to sleep.

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Castiel woke to the sound of the door closing, and knew that Gabriel had just left. He didn't know how long he had slept until he glanced at the clock, grimacing when he realized it was three o'clock in the morning. He stood, feeling a bit guilty about Sam and Gabriel staying so long, until he heard voices coming from the kitchen down the hall.

He crept from his room and down the passageway, remaining quiet though he recognized the voices. He didn't know why he was being silent, but he didn't question it as he listened to the conversation.

"Castiel finally stopped crying." Gabriel said with a sigh, followed by the scrape of a chair showing that he was sitting down. "Poor guy had to watch the kid die in his arms. I'm surprised he didn't go crazy."

He heard two grunts of agreement, followed by the soft clatter as something was thrown onto the table. "Castiel said this was on Mike when he died. It's The Angels' pendant, isn't it?" Gabriel asked. There was a scrape as someone picked the pendant up, followed by Dean's growl.

"Yeah, this is it. But why would they kill Mike? He had done nothing wrong!" Dean hissed. Castiel knew that's how Dean handled his grief. He became angry, incredibly so.

"I don't know, Dean, but we'll figure out." Sam said, the determination in his voice giving Castiel a flutter of hope. He knew that if the brother's decided to hunt down these monsters, they would not fail.

Castiel backed up as he heard the scrape of the chair followed by footsteps. He slipped back into his room just in time as Sam walked past, entering the bathroom and shutting the door. Castiel sighed in relief, only to flinch when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket.

He picked it up, slowly looking at the number on the phone. When he realized it was the same number that had tried to recruit him for The Angels, rage flooded his body with such an intensity that he became shaking. How dare they call after they had killed one of his family.

He pressed the talk button, lifting it slowly to his ear. "What?" He hissed, keeping his voice low so Dean and Gabriel wouldn't hear from the kitchen. It was silent for a few moments, and Castiel almost believed that no one was there, until a soft breath echoed a presence, followed by the same warped voice of last time.

"Have you made your choice? Will you join us?" The voice said, the cockiness of it making Castiel's blood boil. He had half a mind of just joining so he could find the leader and blow his brains out, and then it clicked. Why doesn't he?

"What would I have to do should I join?" Castiel asked, his voice remaining carefully void of what he was planning. The voice was silent for a minute, a steady breathing replacing it.

"You would have to take a series of tests to prove your loyalty. Should you falter in any of them, you and your family would be killed on the spot." The voice finally said, and Castiel took a deep breath. This plan was going to get him killed, but he would have his revenge.

"I'm in."