Title: Magic blood at hogwarts
Genre Fanfiction
Rating: 2/10 Since these people are new characters you should introduce them more their backstory their life what they look like the setting they are in. You are using Paragraphs but remember to indent before every paragraph. Remember to be more descriptive too.In the story she talks about Cameron but yet you never say who that person is. Everyone know who Danielle dad is it is poseidon but we all know Poseidon only had Percy so that would not work.
Danielle was never mentioned in any of the books so don't put her in it makes it unrealistic. Like when lilith gets paralyzed we seen the list of everyone who got paralyzed in the 2 and she was not on the list I know it's a fanfiction but unless she had a time turner she and lilith would not have been at hogwarts.
Since Lilith is a muggle born it does not mattered if she is a witch she would not have a vault she would have to exchange her muggle money for galleons and other money.
You can't have Nico be there because 1st it's back and time and he never went there so your story is not realistic.
Lastly Where is the sorting hat or the gringotts song?
YOU ARE READING
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