Mackenzie | √

Chapter 21

"I really wonder why you're always so happy on a school morning when everyone wishes to be anywhere but school." I said to Bambi as we walked to our lockers.

Bambi let out a chuckle, shrugging.

Bambi and I opened our lockers at the same time, both chuckling. At that time, Ryan came along, hands in his pocket. "Hey girls!" He greeted, smiling.

"Hi Ryan." I looked at him, returning his smile.

"Bambi?" Ryan turned to look at Bambi who was busy grabbing her notes from her locker. She didn't look at Ryan, and I could tell that she was definitely still angry about yesterday.

"Oh, Bambi's just feeling a little-" I tried to cover for her.

"I'm perfectly fine." Bambi looked at me.

"How's mom?" Ryan asked.

"She-" I started to say.

"Maybe if you weren't so busy you wouldn't be asking that question" Bambi snapped, "You really wanna know how she is?-"

"Bambi." I called sternly, looking at her.

"Oh, right." Her words came out as a grumble.

For the first time, I was happy the bell rang, it just saved us from an awkward situation.

"I'll see you later." Bambi said, then turned around and walked away, notes in hand.

"Kenzi?" Ryan called.

I sighed, "Please, Ryan. Don't ask." I said, ignoring the hurt expression on his face as I asked, "Can we go to class?"

I didn't want to talk about Mom now. I wasn't just ready for it. Thinking of it alone made my heart heavy. Ryan and I walked in silence to class and while he threw occasional glances at me.

*

"Mackenzie, again, I need your attention here." Mrs Martinez said.

I sighed in frustration, closing my eyes tightly and running a hand through my hair.

"What the hell is she always thinking about?" I heard a guy say at the back.

What?

I was ready to ignore what that guy just said, but then, I heard Tanner say, "How to get you a brain, which clearly, you don't have."

"Dude, I wasn't talking to you." The​ guy said.

I wouldn't know who was speaking, because I didn't look back, I just sat, looking down at my note, my eyes closed.

"Hey guys-" Mrs Martinez started to say, but Tanner wouldn't look at her as he said to whoever was speaking.

"Are you stupid or what? You didn't even specify who you were talking to, dimwit."

"Tanner, leave my class." Mrs Martinez said sternly.

"You can't do that, Mrs Martinez," I heard Jesse say, defending his best friend, "That's unfair. If you're going to send Tanner out, then you should ask Brady to leave too. He started it."

"It's fine." Tanner stood, grabbing his notes, "I'll leave," and he left while I sat still, buried in my own thoughts. This had to stop. It just had to. Mrs Martinez would never believe I was okay, and the bitter truth was, I wasn't​. I'll never be until Mom was fine. I'll never be until I stopped crying all night, only to wake up late the next morning.  For crying out loud, Tanner just got sent out of class because of me.

*

I walked in the cafeteria alone when it was lunch time. Bambi wasn't out and I was definitely sure she had been called back by a teacher or maybe she wanted to stay back. Ryan wasn't here well, of course. It was so damn crazy the way I was getting used to Ryan not being around again. I was supposed to be bothered, but I just found myself warming up to the fact that he wasn't there.