[36] Denials And Deceit

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No no no

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No no no. I shake my head, my hands trembling as I clicked on a couple of buttons to change cameras.

"Come on," I groaned, unable to get to a different camera view where I could see what was happening.

I glanced up the window to see that the sun has already lightened up what I thought was the dark sky. Decorated with hundreds of clouds that kept its light out, birds flew around, squeeking and I whimpered.

To make matters worse, the screens went out, rudely turning black in my face and I found myself let out a scream of frustration only to have it muffled by both of my hands.

My vision involuntarily started to blur with tears and I dashed out of the office and through the intricate hallways. I don't know where I was going but I hoped that my feet would take me to my room or Amelia's.

Hell, of course, the universe hates me and I stopped, realizing I was lost in this stupid white building. There was nothing in this hallway. Not even a single humanoid.

I felt imprisoned in this reflective corridor as I sunk to my knees on the cold floor, staring off at the never ending passage through the hair strands that fell to my face.

I panted, my heartbeat getting into overdrive while my body shook at the intensity of my sobbing.

I should've known this would happen. I should've sent help way earlier than this.

I rested my back against the cold wall, pulling my knees up to my chest. My arms loosely wrapped themselves around my knees, my fingers fiddling with each other upon meeting.

The back of my head hit the wall and I grimaced, too focused on the guilt that took hold of my every being to even notice the searing pain in my head.

My chest rose and fell harshly as I took in breaths to help me calm down but apparently, breathing was nothing but a bother. It only hurt more. Thinking back to it, all the signs were there. Now, I'm not assuming any more because I'm more sure than I've ever been for once in my life.

All along, I kept delaying my return because I was scared of owning up to my mistake. The mistake I made that caused Hector to do all this.

"You're wrong," I screamed. "Nothing you're doing is right, Hector."

"Oh really? You know how much I'm disgusted by you right now?" He pointed at me, blaming me for something everyone would've done if they heard what he was saying. "Here I am, telling you my story just so you would turn against me."

"I've been against you for so long, dumbass. You're nothing but a psychopath, Hector. No one and I mean no one would ever think the same way you're thinking only because they've been bullied by some stupid eminents in a village."

"It was not just bullying." He slammed his palm against the glass table, causing it to crack under the force of his hit. "It was way more."

"How much more? Did they spit on you? For all I know that's as far as the Chief would let them." I ran my fingers through my hair but eventually, they got stuck in a mess of tangles and I pulled them out.

"Chief? You still consider that man a Chief after he slaughtered your parents? How naive could you be, Felicity?" His lips turned into a snarl as he angled his body from me, shaking his head.

"Don't change the subject," I yelled, clenching my fists. "You're just using our circumstances to get your so called revenge."

"That's right! I'm using you and your friends to get to what I've always wanted. Congratulations, Felicity," he clapped his hands, "you caught on."

I wanted to rip the fake grin off of his face in a heartbeat. He's nothing but a weak asshole who turned his back on his own village and destroyed its destiny with his own hands.

I always knew he would send me to the arena. Always.

Because he was so open to it and he told me about it long before he told Brandon and Amy. That argument was... intense, you could say. And right after it, he told me he doesn't want me here anymore and plans on sending me off with the eminents since, I quote, you're so attached to them.

I knew he wanted to test my loyalty. I knew the truth all along yet I still was surprised when Brandon and Amelia told me all about it.

I never wanted to admit it but I definitely dug my own grave that day.

"You know? It's not just about testing your loyalty, Felicity. It's about punishing you for thinking you could get away with betraying my trust and turning against me. It's about knowing where you stand." Hector intertwined his fingers together and rested his chin on them. He was calm and somehow, I was too.

This... this is something my friends don't know. Something I've kept as a secret of my own so I wouldn't bother them with it. Because I thought it was already over for me.

"You won't die. And I'll make sure of that," he said sincerely. "Just... punished." He shrugged. "I think you should revise your decisions and by the time you'll remember your parents' death, you would be against them."

I didn't understand what he meant at that moment. But now I do. Clearly too.

As I mentioned before, he picked those specific names for a reason and... their job was to stay away from me which would immediately cause tension and hatred between them and I.

So why was I angry at Brandon so much if I already knew it was all Hector's plan? Well... that's because he told me Brandon didn't mind me going there.

"However though, your closest friend is with my idea. He thinks you need to reassert your choices."
He? That could only be one person!

Not only was I deceived... but I showed no mercy to the new acknowledged truth.

All along, I knew yet my brain blocked it and kept it in the back of my mind. I knew. I fucking knew.

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