Never Ending Thoughts Of Him

Poem#16:Dream

As I stared at the high ceilings
And tried to forget my feelings
Tears bitterly continue to fall
For the guy who started it all

Suddenly everything became black
And only silence seem to dwell
Then without a clue, he is back
With a look as if he's being well

When the abrupt flare showed me
The guy who held me back when I was free
I thought I could let go of his warm grasp
But the sensation has made time elapse

Subconsciously, I couldn't let go
Of the person I used to know
Forgotten pain he unknowingly gives
If only I could move on and easily forgive

Yet there he is, asking
"For how long could you hold on?"
And even though I want to keep believing
I need to end it, for my own redemption

The tone of his voice says otherwise
Those joyful moments we shared
Is now replaced with bitterness of his lies
Though I actually thought he really cared

"I can't hold on anymore to you, I'm sorry"
These words I've been trying to repeat
Over and over, making it my history
Never for him, let my heart skip a beat

All contradicting thoughts being reminisced
Opened my eyes to what's really reality
Undeniably, he'll become someone I'll miss
Undoubtedly, setting us free completely

He sincerely let go, his question echoing
"Will your life be better without me?"
I saw my past self, stumbling and crying
Saying, "Please go away" because to the struggles he cannot see

In a blink of an eye, he was gone
The sunshine's rays filled the room
Actions of yesterday that cannot be undone
Unsaid words of now place us in doom

I gasped for air for it was just a dream
My fantasy telling me to let go
Though as difficult as it may seem
I'll stand up without you, for I shall now redeem myself and glow