Love vs Sanity (An Alastor x Reader story)

A New Instinct

The days seemed to be more duller and painful. especially at school. Your heart felt began to feel numb in your body and the feeling felt worse whenever you saw Alastor.

It seemed like he stopped trying to apologize and just let things go. He's never at your table anymore. It hurt to not see him there in the mornings. You loved his smile in the mornings. The trips to your classes were more lonely, and he would completely ignore you in the classes you had together.

Eventually word got around that you two weren't together anymore. Some of the more popular girls mocked you for it, even the girl you punched was laughing about it. You ignored them the best you could though. 

During lunch, you hid away in the library, away from your friends and the possibility of seeing them together. You heard some people talk about how Al was with a new girl, which made your heart ache more.

The thought of Al made you sad and numb, but thinking of Rosie was almost the opposite. It felt like you haven't been so angry or frustrated at something or someone in your life. And thinking about her made the urge feel stronger.

~~

When you got home all you did was hide off in your room. Even though it was fairly normal to do, it didn't have the same lazy energy. It was more stressed, depressed and draining. All you really wanted to do was sleep. 

Which is exactly what you did.

You were in a dark room, with no way out. There was no doors or window, just a room that was dimly lit by a candle on a small table. 

"Hello?" You called out. Silence followed. You walked a bit away from the light and called out again.

No one answered, but soon you could hear faint whispers. They were to quiet to understand, even straining to hear them didn't help.

Suddenly, you heard a voice behind you. It sounded like yours, but a little off putting in a way you couldn't identify. "Why hello there, you called?"

You turned around to face the voice, and you saw what you thought was yourself for a moment. But there were some noticeable changes. They wore a mask, similar to one in some of your other dreams you've had, and their hair was longer. They were also taller than you by around a foot.

"Who...Are you?" You asked. The entity just laughed for a moment. It sounded chaotic almost. It unnerved you.

"I'm you silly. Who else would I be?" They stepped closer to you, and in the dim light you noticed the red tinted stains on the mask and some cracks on the edges. 

"You're not me." You shook your head. You turned to look at the shadows on the edges of the room.

They sighed and stood up straighter. "I'm your natural instinct dumb ass. You made me." They tilted your head to the side.

"O-oh..." Is all you managed to say. You rubbed your arm and sighed. "So...Why are you here?"

When the question was asked, you had a feeling they were grinning ear to ear. "Don't you want that Rosie girl to be gone?" 

"Well...Yeah..." Even if you were mad at Alastor, deep down you still wanted you to be his and no one else's.

"If you want Alastor to be yours forever, you need to let me take care of it." They walked around you to the other side of the room.

You turned around to face their back. "Take care of, how?" You asked. They simply laughed again.

"I think you should know, you've had dreams about them before."  You could hear the twisted happiness in their voice.

It took you a few minutes to figure out what they were talking about. Then it finally clicked. The dreams where you were looking through a mask at a nearly dead body. The dream about chasing a woman around on the streets. Dropping the mask on the ground during a chase.

"You...Want to kill her?" You asked slowly. 

"Indeed! It's a great solution to the problem, isn't it?" They turned around, almost bouncing in excitement. "Think about it, Al sure would be proud of your first kill, wouldn't he~? He's a serial killer after all." She snickered and placed a hand on your shoulder, their nails digging into you slightly, making you wince.

You didn't have any words against what they were suggesting. Deep down, you knew it was wrong, but the satisfaction on the other hand, would it be as great as they say it would be? You wanted to get Alastor back.

Sighing, you look into the masks eyes. "I'll accept your offer." 

They took their hand off your shoulder, and you could hear the smile in their voice. "Perfect! Just listen to your instinct from now on, okay?"

You woke up staring at the ceiling, not sure how to process your thoughts. It seemed the conversation in your dream was real, you could still feel the phantom feeling of the persons hand on your shoulder. You had the mask imprinted into your mind. 

Did you actually make that deal? Or was it just an illusion...You didn't know anymore. Your dreams may have been foretelling your future all this time...