My Hope (Complete)

Chapter 8

Hope

Mom takes me to school. I don't have anything to say in the car. I just need to get through first period so I can see Noah in second. All that seems to matter is seeing him. Maybe I can just casually walk past his classroom on my way to Math. I don't realize Mom is trying to say goodbye. "Oh, sorry, I was in my own head."  "That's okay sweetie. Just make sure you wake up before class." She leans in and kisses my cheek. I wish it were that easy.

Zade and Zander are at the side of the car waiting for me to get out. "Your bodyguards are waiting sweetie. Don't want to keep them waiting." She then winks. I moan, say goodbye and get out. The boys walk with me to the school. They join me at my locker. "You okay Hope?" Zander asks quietly. "Yeah, just feeling out of it. I had a weird dream." "I'm sorry. I needed to go walk by English to get something from Noah. Let's head that way before your first class."  Relief must be written all over my face because Zane says, "It's okay Hope, we get it." I smile at him. "Thanks." Do they know that I feel like my heart is breaking until I see him? Do they sense that I can hardly breath?

As we get closer to his room, I can already smell him. How is that possible? My mind is tricking me. He turns to see me out in the hall before I even get to the door. He takes a big breath and runs his hands through his hair. It's disheveled already. He looks a little tired. He smiles as we walk in. "Hope." He whispers. I can breathe again. My mind is clearing. Is this how it feels to fall in love? I don't know if any of this is normal. The guys speak briefly. I just stand there, soaking in the peace I feel now that I'm in his presence. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. My heart rate is returning to normal.

I hear the first bell and open my eyes to Noah already looking at me. He simply nods his head. I feel like he is telling me that I will be okay. I nod back in agreement and leave to go to class. As I'm about to enter Math, Zander puts his hand on my arm. "It will get easier." He tells me. I don't know what that means or how he knows, but I believe him. I head to my seat. Wink guy is there as always. I ignore him and listen to the teacher. Time goes by at a snail's pace.

When we get to English, I feel like I can almost handle the rest of the day. Noah looks better. You can't see the dark circles under his eyes anymore. His big smile is ready to greet me. "Good morning Hope. How are you today?" He asks as if he didn't see me a little over an hour ago. I guess nonchalant is his go to move right now. This morning he seemed concerned. Now, he's fine. I guess I do feel a lot better than I did then. I wonder why.

I have a lot to say in class today about the reading assignment last night. I hear one of the girls in the back whisper, "suck up."  I don't know how I could hear that. But I did. And it hurt. Noah's eyes go to hers. Did he hear her too? "Did you have something productive to add to her answer Miss Johnson?" He asks her. "No, Mr. Kingston." I can't help my little smile. Zade elbows me with a little laugh.

At lunch, the guys lead us back to Noah's classroom again after we grab our food. "Thank you." I tell them both when we get near his classroom door. "It's no problem at all. We eat in here a lot." Zander tells me. Zade locks the door behind us. Noah tells me to take the seat next to his where I sat during Creative Writing. I gladly do so. They talk animatedly about things they did as kids. All of us are laughing and enjoying ourselves. Noah sounds like a good big brother. I can tell they look up to him.

Noah asks me a lot about my childhood after they tell me some about theirs. Noah mentions his Dad numerous times. The twins never met him, just like I never met my Dad. All of Noah's memories are good ones. He was incredibly involved in Noah's life. I feel the need to tell them that my biological Dad died. But I really don't have a great sense of loss about it because my adopted Dad has cared for me as his own. I feel like adding this information to the conversation would seem like I was saying that I understand how they feel, when really, I can't imagine their pain. They grew up with no Dad. I had one. Their loss must be greater than mine.

The day drags until Creative Writing. I get to bask in his presence once again for an entire hour. One of the girls in the class flirts mercilessly with him. I can't really blame her. He's gorgeous, and smart, and smells so good...But, it is really starting to get to me. I think Noah senses how uncomfortable I am. "Miss Daniels, if you continue making inappropriate comments, I am going to have to ask you to leave the class and you will be transferred to a different elective. There is a waiting list of students who would be more than happy to take your place." He says authoritatively. "Oh, um, no, that's okay. I won't say anything else." She tells him sheepishly. Well, that took care of it. I can't help the little smile on my face. I try to hide it behind the papers I have in my hands. I didn't know there was a waiting list for this class. Maybe that's why he suggested I be the T.A. instead of just one of the students.

The twins meet me here as is our routine now. They stay for a few minutes and talk to him about of couple of things that happened today. It seems Zander has an admirer that he is not interested in. He tells his brothers some of the things she is doing to get his attention. They all laugh. I just listen, amazed that he isn't interested. I know the girl they are talking about, and she is gorgeous. Maybe these three aren't shallow like most guys. "Why don't you like her?" I decide to ask. They all look a little surprised. Maybe she is a horrible person. "We don't date for the fun of it Hope. We were raised to only date someone we are truly serious about. Mom taught us that the woman we fall for will be our perfect compliment. And If I can tell she isn't it, I'm not wasting my time." Zander tells me seriously. I look at Noah. He nods his head. Wow.

With that being said, we leave to go home. I look back one last time. Taking in his face for the last time today. He looks as sad as I feel. "Tomorrow." Is all he says. I nod my head and leave the room. The drive home is quiet. "Hey, so Saturday you guys are coming for dinner. We can meet your Dad." Zade reminds me. "Yeah, he's a great guy. You will like him." They drop me off and I start my homework. My mind gets cloudier as time goes by. I start to get a little headache. I take some Tylenol and keep working.

Dad comes home. I cook dinner. We eat. Same as always. I can't stop thinking about Noah. This is getting ridiculous. Mom comes home and checks on me. By this time, I feel worse. Mom can tell. She tries to figure out what's wrong with me. I can't tell her that I believe I'm having withdrawals from not being near my teacher, who I am obviously in love with after only a week. Yeah, insane. I go to sleep and dream of him again. Still no kiss.

Authors note: who loves Noah? Me! Thanks for reading. Please vote if you liked it.