Feel my love...

CHAPTER 14

Do I sound too dramatic in my stories?🤔 Just curious😁. And here is an update y'all.

I knew heart breaks are painful, but I never expected it to be so painful. Too many things happened through short period of time and I'm yet to wrap my head around it all. Liam told me everything, but I lost him forever.

Sounds simple, but it's hard to accept.

Ever since I met him, all I have thought about is nothing but him. But right now, the very thought of him sends me through another painful breakdown. I try hard not to think about him, but the more I try, the more I think about him.

I haven't turned on my phone since I arrived to Bradford and I haven't left my bed since I came in, my mama brought me food to my room which I rarely ate. Memory after memory of Liam replays in my mind and I wish I had a turn off switch. But it doesn't work like that. My family left me alone upon my request and I'm yet to shed a tear. I'm like a tense bubble, and anytime to burst. I don't want them to witness it.

Guess, I fell hard for him without realising it myself. The moment you realise you love someone and when they don't feel the same, it hurts like bitch. Right now, I doubt if Liam ever felt anything for me, if I'm the only one to feel for him. Maybe he just didn't want to hurt me so he agreed to be my boyfriend.

But all those intense moments, cuddling memories, they were like he can't live without me. It was like he needed me as much as I needed him. But he broke up with me now and all of the memories feels like a dream, a painful one. His touch felt so real, touching him felt so real that I can still feel it. It still lingers in the tips of my fingers, tingles my lips, but in a painful way.

I roll over to my side, and stare into nothing. But my gaze focuses on something, a small white teddy bear. It's Safaa's I think, but it doesn't do anything good to me right now. One of my cuddly conversations with him engulfs me painfully.

"Tell me about your exes" he requested.

"For what?" I asked suspiciously. He fiddled with my collar for few minutes before answering.

"Just curious" he shrugged.

"If you are wondering if they are anything like you, the answer is no" I told him. "I have dated quite people yes, but I have never asked out someone before. You are the first one"

"Ohh" he nodded, as if we are discussing the world's greatest problems and it made me smile.

"Is Stella your only ex?" I questioned and he sighed.

"Yes, I guess. I have kissed few people but she is first real girlfriend I had" he said "but you are my first real boyfriend"

"Hmm" I hummed. "What is that you like the most in me?"

He blushed in answer and ducked his head.

"You answer first" he said and I thought for a moment.

"Many things, I suppose" I said looking back at him. "I love you hair"

"Really? How about now?" He asked with a goofy smile, ruffling his hair until it was messy on his head. I chuckled and kissed his forehead.

"Even now" I said and he grinned. "And your lips"

Now pinkness coated his cheeks and I caress them with my thumb, loving it when he blushed because of me.

"And your eyes" I whispered "Your nose, your birthmark, your scent"

"You should just go ahead and tell me you like everything about me" he'd muttered.

"No, there is something I don't like" I admitted. "When you devalue yourself, I hate it. I want you to love yourself"