How was I supposed to feel

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~Gerard POV~

Frank left. Where he went  had no clue I didn't care. I just lay in bed. Franks bed.  I felt.... I-I felt.

I didn't know how to feel, I didn't know how to feel, how was I supposed to feel? 

I missed his presence when he wasn't there, but when he was there I felt like shit.

I hated him, yet I still was immobilized with my lust for him.

I- I... I Just didn't know.

He was so..... frustrating.

How did he feel about me?  I shouldn't have cared about how he felt about me. I shouldn't have cared.

I had been alive for 17 years and he was my first kiss. frank iero was my first kiss. The realization swept over me like a wave on a shore. I kissed frank iero. Many times. I slept in the same bed as him we were so close for so long. And then he regretted it and then kissed me again. he is so mercurial. I realized I cared.

Where did he go?...

Why had he left?....

Why was he a monster?....

Why?....

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