Chapter 29: How To Live

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For all my life, I had never felt love.

My parents didn't love me. I had no friends, no siblings, no grandparents.

I had spent my entire life, alone.

Until one night, a handsome stranger approached me and offered to help me cut my steak. 

Because I had never loved, I never knew how much it could consume you. How much you could be willing to do for the person you love. 

Until now. Until Ezra. 

My cheeks are soaked as the police officer escorts me out of the building. Ambulances filled the roads, their flashes lighting up my face. Dead bodies got loaded into them like a fucking cargo ship.

"I'm going to take you to that ambulance, ma'am," the officer pointed to one of them.

I didn't give a shit. I wasn't worried about myself.

"Lilac?!" Eliza and Asher call out in usion. 

They run over to me, both looking worried at the look on my face. Eliza asked quietly, looking me up and down nervously, "Why are you crying?"

"They shot him," the words tasted disgusting coming out of my mouth.

Both of their eyes widened. Eliza asked the police officer, "Is he still alive?!"

"Highly unlikely. There's not even an ambulance here that's meant to be for him," the officer said bluntly, and if I hadn't lost so much blood, I would've punched him in the face.

"The fuck do you mean highly unlikely!" Eliza screamed, and other officers began rushing over.

They all held Eliza back, who had murder written on her face.

The officer started dragging me toward the ambulance. Each step I took was hard, but not because of my stomach. Because of the feeling in my heart.

The rain had stopped now, making everything feel louder.

I approached the ambulance, which had the back doors open and ready. The officer left me with the EMT, but I didn't get in. I just stood there.

He can't be dead. I fucking need him.

I fucking love him.

Tears fell from my cheeks as I cried. I can't handle this kind of pain. I can't-

"Atlas has a heartbeat!" a police officer's voice called out. 

My heart skipped a beat as I lifted my head up. I turned, watching EMTs bring Ezra out on a stretcher. I quickly turned to the EMT beside me, "Here, let him take my ambulance."

I didn't give them any time to argue. I backed away while the lights flashed down on me, and for a second, my tears dried. 

He could live.

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Hospital chairs are the most uncomfortable thing to sleep in ever. 

And even though I had my stitching redone a few days ago, it still hurts when I move abruptly. 

"Hey," Eliza nudged my arm. "You want me to get you some food? You haven't eaten today."

It's been three days since Ezra came into the hospital. Three entire sunrises and sunsets. The doctors said that it was bad, and he needed emergency surgery. And he hasn't woken up since. 

"Sure," I reply to Eliza after yawning and rubbing my eyes.

I've been sleeping on Asher's shoulder every night, and God is it uncomfortable. My cheek hurts from his freaking pointy bone. 

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