The Misfit

I love you

"Don't you think this is too much?" I question while staring at myself in the mirror. It was a nice dress that complemented my body perfectly, but when I looked in the mirror I was overwhelmed with a feeling that made my stomach twist. Maybe it was nerves or anxiety, but I knew that this dress was not meant for someone like me.

"There is no such thing especially since you are the birthday girl. Also you look perfect, that dress was made for you!" Macie said. With that sentence alone it shows how different we are. She is more confident and out going, the two things I will never be.

The thing is, Macie has never had a problem with the way she looks, and she shouldn't, she is gorgeous. She is tall and tan, and has the most beautiful brown hair with honey highlights, and the perfect body. I've always been jealous, which I know is wrong because she is my best friend, but sometimes I cant control it.

I see how guys look at her and it makes me think that I have nothing to be desired. I am the complete opposite of her. I often catch myself thinking about whether Warren regrets being with me. All that I have ever done is cause him trouble, for someone who stays to themselves I sure do know how to make a disruption in some ones life. Part of me doubts the praises he makes about my body.

Its not that I don't trust him, its more that I doubt my capability of being desirable. So when I dress up I feel like I am like a little girl playing in her mothers clothes, like I look like a fool.

"Franny, are you ok? I have been talking to you." she said with a concerned look on her face.

I cant bring myself the actually admit these self- deprecating thoughts. I understand that everyone is their greatest critic, but some times it is such a mental battle.

"I'm good, Thank you so much for helping me get ready." I thanked her while pulling her into a quick hug. She wrapped her arms around me and gave me a tight squeeze.

"Those bruises shouldn't be visible at all, but they sure were hard to cover." Macie commented with a sigh. We pulled apart and I saw the tears brimming in her chocolate brown eyes.

"Max told me" she confessed with a sad expression which caused me to let out a sigh. I stood there for a moment, not knowing how to confront the situation. The tears were now freely running down her cheeks.

" Why didn't you call me or something." she asked while staring into my eyes.

"Yeah, and what were you going to do get on a flight back home, I didn't want to be a burden and ruin your family vacation." I said trying to explain my reasoning behind not telling her. Her bottom lip wobbled and more tears rushed down her cheeks. .

"I just wish I could have helped you somehow. You don't deserve this and that Son of a bitch needs to rot in hell." she exclaimed in between hiccups.

"look there is no changing what happened to me no matter how much I could. but don't waste your tears on me ok. If anything it made me stronger, and it proves that I'm not easy to break. And I know you wish you could have helped me, but it made me happy to know that you were unbothered and living the time of your life." I said while I grabbed a tissue and handed it to her.

"now wipe those tears, fix your makeup and put a smile on." I commanded. She wiped her tears with a small smile forming on her lips at my words.

"You know I'm supposed to be the one comforting you in this situation, right?" she said with a snot of a laugh.

I shrugged unbothered with a small smile, "what are friends for"

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