Love and where to Find it (Draco x Reader)

Grievances

Classes had gone by in a daze for (F/N) as she had sat in her seat day after day, worrying over if she would receive a letter from her mother, and she had barely spoken to her friends or even eaten anything. Alison had tried to distract her friend from her worries, but she would always just leave and stay in her room most of the time. Alison had gone to her room and sat on her bed, sharing in hilarious stories that happened throughout the day, or just brought some sweets that Alison would sneak back from dinner. It had been a couple of weeks since the young witch had heard from her mother, and even though she refused to believe it at first, it was evident that she knew what it had meant. She read the will over several times and stressed over the properties given to her. She didn't know the first thing about any of this.

"Ali, does your family know a thing or two about running businesses and owning properties?" (F/N) asked her friend one day.

"I suppose they do, what do you think you may need?" her best friend asked with a smirk.

"Um, like advice on everything. Could you ask for me, please?" (F/N) asked while reading over the list her mother left her.

"I don't mind at all, I'll send an owl this week for you. But are you sure you're okay? You don't want to talk about it?”

"I assure you, Ali, I'm fine. How have you been, though, with George? You guys are just so perfect for each other, it hurts!" She took off all focus from her problems as she placed the paper down beneath her hands, teasing the witch beside her.

Ali blushed and looked down. "Oh hush, (F/N)."

"Aww, look at you blushing," She chuckled.

"I said hush," Her flustered best friend said with a sigh.

"Alright, fine, I'll hush," (F/N) smiled. "I honestly do think your perfect for each other, though" she urged one more time earnestly.

Ali smiled. "Yeah, yeah you sap, but instead of obsessing over me, are you positive you don't want to have a cry sesh? It's okay, ya know."

(F/N) sighed "I know it's okay to cry, but I simply haven't the time. I'm planning my mothers funeral with my father, and it's pretty nerve-racking that I face having to run several businesses while still being a student at Hogwarts. I am flustered and tired but there is no time for grief, not yet, at least. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine-I am fine." (F/N) said as she hugged her best friend. Alison smiled and accepted (F/N)'s response for now; maybe this front she had been putting on was her way of grieving. "I have to go meet up with Severus now, catch up later yeah?"

"Yeah, sounds good," Alison responded and (F/N) stood up and walked off.

She didn't have a meeting with Snape at all, she just wanted to stop talking about grieving for her dead mother. (F/N) walked down the corridor and sat in her newfound hiding place. It was a small unused closet and inside she had made it her safe place, a place where she was able to study without being treated like a hurt puppy. It was also a place where she reviewed her mother's mementos from when Clarissa was a student. Reading journals, looking at old sketches and reviewing recipes her mother invented during her work as an apothecary. It was her makeshift sanctuary for now.

---

Draco couldn't help but worry about the way (F/N) was handling her mother's death, just as many had noticed. He wasn't allowed to spend much time with her as per Severus's orders for his punishment, but the time they did share together, it was like nothing happened. They studied for their exams, did their homework, and even kissed, but not a single word of Clarissa would come up.

"Professor Snape," Draco said one afternoon after stocking the potions, “can I ask you about something important?"

"Yes Mr. Malfoy, what might it be?" Snape didn't make eye contact as he had continued to write something on his parchment, sitting at his desk.

"It's (F/N), I'm worried about her."

Snape lifted a brow quizzically. "About what specifically?"

"Well, she hasn't cried?" Draco had made it almost sound like a question as if he weren't entirely sure what he expected.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Her mother just died, so I would think so," Draco responded.

"Everyone responds to grief differently, Mr. Malfoy, her form of grief could be something else entirely. Not everyone believes crying does any good."

Draco sighed and shrugged "I guess," he said gently. "Just, you would let me know if you felt the same right? About being worried?" Snape looked annoyed at the boy.

"Yes, Mr. Malfoy, I will run straight to your dorm room the moment I feel that (F/N) isn't being healthy about dealing with her mother's death," Snape said sarcastically. Draco let out another sigh, voicing his disapproval. "Is that all, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Indeed, it is."

"You are dismissed then," Snape said, motioning to the door.

----

Early one morning, the young witch sat on her own at the table as she picked at a flaky biscuit and ate small bits of it, her eyes scanning the papers again and again ever since she received them. It all meant nothing to her right now, so her stress levels were almost at max. (F/N) had suddenly felt a gentle hand placed on her shoulder; it was Professor McGonagall. Her wise eyes looked down into the girls' own and she gave her a small smile. "Ms. (L/N), Dumbledore would like to have a meeting with you." Professor McGonagall said. (F/N) nodded and stood from the table, leaving her plate almost as full as when it had been served, and she went on her way up to Dumbledore's office. She was let in and told to have a seat before him.

"Your mothers funeral is this Saturday," the elder wizard stated as he took his seat opposite the student.

"Yes, it is sir," she confirmed.

"And you're not requesting additional time off from classes?"

"Why should I do that?"

"Well, she is your mother and she died tragically, so you don't think that warrants more time than just a weekend?"

"Headmaster, with everything going on around the school, like the tournament, the Death Eater attacks, schoolwork, I think that my mothers' death shouldn't be a topic anyone should worry about. I already arranged everything, invited people she knew and wrote to the family about the news. Everything is well organized down to what her nail polish color will be."

Dumbledore sat there, studying her with a stone-like stare. He leaned forward and grabbed a small handful of candies from a bowl on his desk, then popped one in his mouth. He let out a deep sigh before speaking again. "That's just it, (F/N). This doesn't bother, you not even a little bit?"

"My mother died alone in a bed of an apartment I never knew she had. She drank a poisonous concoction and was found because someone complained of the odor. Yes, it affects me greatly, but I can't let it get to me. With respect, may I ask you this? Why is this so important to you, that I cry for her?"

"Well, she was one of my students, you and she have a lot of similarities, you remind me a lot of her. I've also heard how hard this year has been on you and well, and a few of your peers have voiced their concerns." (F/N) scoffed. "They care for you and your well being, as do I.”

His voice would barely get to her, just like her friends, or even Draco. She shut them out, not wanting to think of anything having to do with her mother. She was almost in a daze as Dumbledore spoke to her again, but he noticed her change of expression and stopped to hand her the bowl of candies. She blinked a few times and looked up at him apologetically.

“I'm sorry, professor, I'm just-”

“My dear,” he interrupted, “I will admit that you are not the only one going through something so traumatizing, but I will say this; you are lucky. You had a mother who cared for you and loved you dearly, and she wanted nothing but the best for you. She has given her life for that, so that is something you must remember. And as little as he knew about the situation, Severus would have been there to care for you if he had known. Trust me, Severus is a good man, and he will be there in your time of need. Do not shut people out when you need them most. Would you like a toffee?”

(F/N)'s heart felt heavy as she listened to the headmaster speak, but all she could bring herself to do was nod and grab a few candies from the bowl. She left the office silently chewing on the candies with much to think about.