My Missing Puzzle Piece

Chapter Fifteen

Arielle-

"Arielle? Oh Arielle please wake up!"

What was that? Who was calling out my name? Where was I?

I tried opening my eyes but failed and I started to panic inside.

"Arielle?" They spoke up again. "I don't know if you can hear me but I want you to listen to me."

I wish I knew who was talking. The voice sounded like someone I knew and their hand gripped onto mine tightly.

"Arielle.." The person said quietly. "I am so worried about you. I've been worried about you a lot lately. I know you don't think I love you, but I do love you and I want to apologize for everything I've ever done that caused this to happen. I was unsure of how much pain you were dealing with. I know I'm suffering too but I don't want you to suffer."

Their voice was calming and somehow, I felt safe. I found myself trying to open my eyes and finally, the light hit my eyes and I blinked a couple of times and spotted my mom looking at me with shock all over her face. My mom? What was she doing here?

"Mom?" I asked tiredly, unsure of why she was here or why I was even in here.

"Oh Arielle!" She squeezed my hand tighter and smiled. "You're up!"

"Why..am..I..at the hospital?"

"Oh." She said, sad in her voice. "You passed out and I found you unconscious on the floor, blood everywhere.."

Oh no. I looked down at my scars to see they were exposed. Great, just great.

I bit my lip, unsure of what to say next. She frowned and patted my leg. "Why, Arielle?"

"You won't understand." I said quietly, avoiding her gaze.

"Try me, Arielle. Listen, I know I haven't been here for you in awhile and I apologize for everything I've ever done to you or didn't do that would've helped you become a better person. I love you, Arielle and I want the best for you. I know your father-"

I cut her off. I didn't wanna hear any of this. "Mom." I said through my teeth. "Just....stop talking, okay? Why are you all of a sudden apologzing? You thought I was dead so you wanted to wait to the last minute?"

"Of course not!" She said, offended by my words. "I'm finally realizing who I should be and that's a nice, loyal mom like I was before."

"Like that'll happen." I said as I rolled my eyes. "Let's just face it mom, nothing will change."

"But what if we can try, hon?"

I don't know why, but I was suddenly getting really angry. All of the anger built inside me was finally coming out. I could finally vent my feelings to the person I was wanting to tell the most, besides my father.

"Nothing will ever change. Aiden ran away, don't you care? He hated living at home and dealing with all of this shit! You don't think I have to deal with it? I have to pretend I'm okay? I had to cut myself to feel okay because I had nothing and no one else! You don't understand and you never will. When you almost killed yourself, I wanted to die! Dad started acting out and it made things even worse! You saw him hurt me many times but you just walked away, like you didn't even care."

"I do care! I did want to stop him but I was afraid he'd hurt me too."

I sighed, not believing this. "So you're saying you were only thinking of yourself? Maybe instead of telling him to stop you could've called 9-11? You stopped it once but there was so many other bad times and I had to pretend that I was okay with him yelling and screaming and calling me negative things to me! I had to let all of my anger and saddness out by locking myself in my room and cutting myself! Do you think I'm happy with this? No. I wanna be a better person but how can I when I'm all around negative people who put me down? You should just go, mom. I should just be left here to die." I was attached to an IV and they were checking my heart monitor after all.