My Missing Puzzle Piece

Chapter Thirty

Arielle-

They thankfully allowed me to go home and I was glad I was getting out of there because it was driving me insane.

Me and Justin were sitting on his bed and the look on his face- I couldn't tell if he was upset, mad or disappointed..

There was an awkward silence and I couldn't take the silence anymore.

"Justin, talk to me, please? You were silent the whole ride home."

"Talk to you about what? How you could be dead right now?" He was mad. I didn't understand why, since just before he was singing me a song and we were okay..

"Justin..don't." I didn't wanna talk about what exactly happened. I know I promised him I wouldn't hurt myself but what else did I have? I was hurt and broken and crying in the school's bathroom stall, what else did I have to do? It's not my fault I went too deep...

"Why? You're trying to avoid the subject."

"I know, but-"

"Do you not realize how worried and freaked out I was? I kept blaming myself for you hurting yourself. I didn't know what else to do.."

I sighed hard and closed my eyes shut. "Well I'm sorry...nothing that I did was caused by you. You did nothing wrong, you did quite the opposite. You stuck up for me and told them off, even Caitlin, the bitch herself. So stop blaming yourself for what I did because it's not you."

"Okay, but you promised me you wouldn't do it anymore.."

"I know, but I had nothing else.."

"You had me. It just hurt me when I found out what you did.."

"I'm sorry." I mumbled.

"Don't be. You're here now, right?" I nodded and wrapped my arms around his waist. "I love you."

"I love you too. Just don't scare me like that ever again, okay?"

"I'll try not to." I replied with a sigh. "I just wanna be okay again."

"You will. You just have to be positive."

"Well I'll try. For myself and for you."

He smiled wide and kissed my lips softly. "Good. As long as you'll try."

I wasn't looking forward to Monday. I would be getting help, but I was sorta nervous. What if they judged me? What if they made fun of me? What if I don't get the help I need? I haven't felt really happy in a long time, if ever, and I hoped I actually did become better and happier. I'd have to learn how to, but I hoped it would all work out.

~x~

"I can't do this!" I paced back and forth, scared to death about today. I was going to start the program today and I was thinking of all the possible things that could go wrong.

Justin tried to calm me down but I just couldn't stop. "You're going to be fine, stop stressing yourself out for nothing." He still wasn't helping.

I couldn't find my words to reply and Pattie didn't make it any better. "Arielle, your mom is here to take you now!"

I started to panic more and Justin took my hand and I squeezed it tightly. I was hoping this was all a dream, but it wasn't.

My mom walked in the front door with a comforting but exhausted smile. "You'll be fine." She mouthed to me. All I could do was nodd, my voice still gone.

I turned to Justin and he kissed my cheek lightly. "You'll do good, okay? It's only for a couple weeks."

I nodded and tried my best to smile. It was awkward with my mom standing there so we ended it short. He kissed my lips lightly for a second before letting me go.