14 | l.s mpreg

chapter twenty-four

"What do you think the meaning of life is?" Louis asked Harry softly as they sat in Harry's backyard, wrapped in a blanket, staring up at the night sky together because both of them had seemed to always be interested in space.

Louis had a fascination with wondering about what else was in space that the human race didn't know about. Or maybe they did. He was interested in aliens, black holes, time warps, and other galaxies. Harry had always found planets and stars to be incredible wonders. He knew every constellation and could name every planet in order without even having to think about it. He often wondered how exactly their galaxy had even been created and while he found that there were many theories stating how it had happened, he found himself making up his own explanations. 

"Loaded question," Harry said as he turned his head to look over at his boyfriend, the light from the back porch still allowing them to see each other. They had been sitting out here for what seemed like an hour or more, watching the sunset and then staying out here regardless of the fact that it was pretty cold out.

"Yeah," Louis smiled a bit as he continued to look up at the sky. "I guess it is. Do you think there even is a meaning?" He questioned softly as Harry's eyes went back up to study the stars in the night sky.

"I think that... there's no way of really knowing," Harry answered softly after a few moments of silence shared between the two of them. "You just kind of have to make up the meaning as you go along."

"What do you mean?" Louis asked curiously as he glanced over at Harry, looking over his soft cheeks and the curve of his eyelashes as he stared up at the sky.

"I think... that the meaning of life changes over time. As we grow older." Harry answered honestly, having thought about this before. "Like when we're born, for example. The meaning of life is to depend on someone else. To feed you, to change you, to teach you. When you're a toddler, the meaning of life is to have fun and be reckless and throw tantrums. When you're a little older the meaning of life is to be a kid, make friends, and live life." He explained softly. "When you're a teenager the meaning of life is confusing. A jumble of things, really. Handling new emotions, learning how to love someone, figuring out who you are..." He said and then looked over at Louis, who was still watching him.

"You've thought about this before," Louis said softly and then nodded his head. "What's the meaning of your life when you become an adult?" He questioned, wanting to hear more of Harry's thoughts on the topic.

"I don't know," Harry answered honestly because he hadn't reached the age of adulthood yet, so how was he supposed to know? "I guess it's... finding out what you're passionate about, knowing yourself, finding a career that you love, getting married, having kids... But I think everyone experiences life differently. So, I think everyone has to find the meaning of life on their own, really."

"You should write a book," Louis said with a small smile, which made Harry laugh a little and then he looked back up at the stars. "You're wise beyond your years, Styles." He teased and Harry only rolled his eyes.

Harry loved moments like these, moments where he and Louis were alone, just talking about nonsense and things that didn't necessarily matter. He liked discussing things with Louis. Controversial topics, popular topics, topics that made absolutely no sense, theories he had about the universe and how things worked, and more. They didn't really talk like this to each other when others were around. Not because they were embarrassed, but because they felt these conversations should only be held with one another. 

It was just another one of those reasons Harry didn't want to tell Louis the news yet. Because if they split because of Harry's decision, discussions like these wouldn't be had by the two boys any longer. Which would be a huge disservice to both of them. He had faith in Louis though, knew that he was the type of guy to stick around in any difficult situation.