𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢 | 𝐬𝐩𝐧

𝐒𝐈𝐗𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

authors note now: this chapter made me cry while writing it. please skip if you have experienced or are sensitive to the topic of suicide
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MAX stared at Sam and Carter, twirling a blade on the counter beside him. "When I first found out I could move things, it was a gift. My whole life I was helpless but now I had this. So last week Dad gets drunk. The first time in a long time. And he beats me to hell, first time in a long time. And then I knew what I had to do." He told them.

"Why didn't you just leave, Max?" Carter asked. "It wasn't about getting away. Just knowing they would still be out there. It was about...not being afraid. When my Dad used to look at me, there was hate in his eyes. Do you know what that feels like? He blamed me for everything. For his job, for his life, for my Mom's death." Max scoffed. "Why would he blame you for your Mom's death?" Sam frowned.

"Because she died in my nursery, while I was asleep in my crib. As if that makes it my fault. There was a fire. And he'd get drunk and babble on like she died in some insane way. He said that she burned up. Pinned to the ceiling! How could I do that?! I was a baby." Max yelled. Sam and Carter looked at each other. "Max. Your dad was right, but it wasn't your fault. My mom died the same way. So did Sam's. You abilities started like 6-7 months ago, right? That's when our abilities started, Max." Carter sighed. "Yours seem to be much further along but still, this has to mean something right? I mean for some reason, you and I...you and I were chosen." Sam sat back, somewhat relieved he wasn't going insane.

"Chosen for what?" Max questioned. "We don't know, but we're going after what killed our moms. Trust me, Max. You have to let your stepmom go. You just have to." Carter requested. "I'm sorry," Max said. In a flash, he opened the closet doors and threw Sam and Carter into them. He blocked the doors with cabinets and the duo began banging on them. "Max, no!" Carter screamed. She and Sam began feeling the same aching pain, a pain you would expect to gain after being stabbed every day for a thousand years, in that second. They fell to the ground and a vision took over their minds.

A vision of Max shooting Dean.

Carter kicked the door angrily, adrenaline soaring throughout her body. The cabinets and closet doors collapsed and Sam ran upstairs. Carter followed him. When they walked in, Dean was standing in front of Alice Miller and the gun floated midair. "No don't! Don't! Please. Please. Max. Max. We can help you. All right. But this, what you're doing. It's not the solution. It's not gonna fix anything." Sam begged. Max was sweaty and crying. His face suddenly relaxed.

"You're right." He said. Carter's heart dropped and her knees became wobbly. Sam and Dean relaxed, not expecting Max's next move. The gun spun around to face Max and as Carter threw herself forward, she realized she was too late. The bullet had already made its way into Max's skull.

-

She didn't look at the boys, nor talk or stutter. Her mind was far away, trapped in both anger and disappointment. Her eyes were outside, watching trees pass. She was trapped in a trance. All she wanted was to help and Carter couldn't.

"Carter," Dean called for what seemed like the millionth time. She couldn't hear him. She walked into the motel room and ran into the bathroom and shut the door. Her reflection was a failure. Carter slid down the door and hugged her knees, tears beginning to fall from her eyes.

Carter never allowed herself to break down like this, but there was something about this death that made her want to scream into a void of nothingness. Maybe it was the relief that spread over Max's face before he pulled the trigger or even the loss that Sam could be feeling. Carter was just broken over it.

Her breathing was tripping over sticks and stones. She inhaled deeply into her jacket, taking in Dean's cologne. There was a light knock on the door, making Carter jump up. "Carter...Let me in, it's Sam." A voice said. "Go away, please, just go away." Carter pleaded, her voice cracking. She took her wallet out of her pocket and opened it. Something slid under the door. It was his hand.

𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊

Carter didn't know who else to call. It was her first night in her home alone, fatherless. Her best friend was gone and she was the one to find him lifeless. As far as she knew, she was alone. Desperate, Carter called her the one person who may understand her situation. When he didn't reply, Carter left a voicemail and locked herself in her father's room, sitting in front of the door.

She didn't hear the car door slam or when the front door fell to the ground after being kicked in. She didn't hear her friend's banging on all of the doors until he finally reached hers. "He's gone, Sam. They're all fucking gone." Carter cried. Sam sat down on the other side of the door. "W-what happened?" He questioned. "I found him in the basement. He---Oh god." Carter sat up and grabbed her father's rum off of the cabinet. "He used hunting rope." She told him. "Carter-" Sam began. "He left me, Sam."

They were quiet. She heard rings slide across the floor and looked beside her at his hand. Carter stood up and he took away his hand, then she let him in. Sam wrapped his arms around her, making Carter collapse as a whirlwind of betrayal, anger, hurt, and sadness set in. He held her through the sobs, not knowing what to say. Being there was enough comfort she needed.

𝐍𝐎𝐖

Carter stood up and opened the door. He was already waiting for her. "I could have saved him." She whispered. Sam wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in close, putting his head on hers until she finally stopped crying.