Ambivalence

I hate you

Aaradhya's POV

The routine I once followed at my home seamlessly transitioned to my husband's house, as if I had merely shifted from one residence to another. The familiar cycle of work, sleep, and meals persisted, albeit in a new setting. Anvi, my confidante, was dearly missed. Our busy schedules allowed for only brief conversations, leaving a void that echoed with the silence of unshared thoughts.

Amidst this adjustment, Ruhani masi and Dadi Sa emerged as sources of love and care. Ruhani masi, in particular, took it upon herself to ensure I didn't neglect my meals. Her insistence on breakfast and dinner manifested in determined efforts to feed me, even if it meant stuffing the meal into my mouth. Their affectionate gestures provided a semblance of comfort in the midst of unfamiliar surroundings.

As for Rana Sa, he remained engrossed in the demands of his business and political responsibilities. His presence was felt more through the absence it created in our shared moments. The one aspect of this marriage that grated on my nerves was the relentless attention from the media and the constant surveillance by an entourage of guards. The feeling of being constantly scrutinized and the lack of privacy were stifling. Even if the desire to escape crossed my mind, the vigilant guards made it clear that any attempt to do so would be futile.

Despite the silent routine and the lack of verbal communication, we shared the same room. His mere presence beside me served as a constant reminder of our marital bond. Conversations between us remained unspoken, yet our eyes seemed to engage in a silent dialogue whenever they met.

The subtle traces of his perfume lingered on my clothes, on the bedsheets, and even on the pillow I used. These faint yet persistent reminders filled the room, creating an ambiance that echoed with his presence even in his physical absence. It was as if the scent had woven itself into the very fabric of our shared space, making his existence palpable even when words were left unspoken. The room became a testament to the intimacy and unspoken connection that transcended the boundaries of verbal communication.

My brother-in-laws, Dev and Reyansh, added an interesting dynamic to the household. While our interactions were minimal, I sensed a conscious effort on their part to ensure I didn't feel uncomfortable in their presence. The unspoken gestures and the occasional exchanges, though brief, spoke volumes about their consideration and attempts to make me feel welcome in this new family. Despite the complexities of the situation, their efforts provided a glimmer of warmth in the midst of the unfamiliarity that surrounded me.

 But I couldn't ignore the odd looks shared between Dev and Dhriti. Dev, who bore a stoic exterior similar to Sharvansh, revealed a softer side when it came to his family. Dhriti, on the other hand, was an enigmatic presence—more private and reserved than even myself. It was as if she had locked away a world of secrets within her.

Reyansh, in contrast, came across as an amiable and jovial person. His warm and caring demeanor reminded me of one of my friends. He was soft-spoken, with a touch of humor, and his interactions felt light-hearted and genuine. In many ways, Reyansh became a source of comfort in an environment filled with enigmatic individuals.

Despite the superficial divide between me and Sharvansh, these newly formed connections within his family brought both solace and intrigue.

Today was Holika, and Dadi Sa had issued a stern warning to all the family members, emphasizing the importance of their presence for the Holika Dahan, a significant ritual during the festival. The air was filled with anticipation and excitement as preparations for the ceremony began.

I got ready in a pink anarkali suit, my hair neatly braided and adorned with matching jewelry. A touch of makeup and a spritz of perfume completed my look. I was prepared to leave when Rana Sa unexpectedly entered the room. The tension between us had persisted for a month, as we both made efforts to keep our distance and ignore each other.