Ambivalence

Holi Part-I

Aaradhya's POV

The next day, I dressed in a white lehenga with pink floral prints for the festival. The royal family celebrated with grandeur, and it felt like a celebrity event. Business tycoons, royalty from other countries, politicians, models, and actors were all invited to join the festivities. The palace was adorned with colorful decorations, and the atmosphere buzzed with excitement.

Despite the festive atmosphere, my anger towards Sharvansh continued to simmer. I had spent the night on the couch, refusing to share the bed with him. I didn't care if the family members learned about the strained nature of our relationship. I had only five more months before our agreed-upon divorce, and I was determined to leave this country as soon as possible.

I joined Dev and Reyansh, seeking refuge in their company as we made our way to the party being held in the royal garden. My family was also in attendance, including my parents, Anvi, and Dhriti. I tried to ignore the presence of Swati and her family, as I had no interest in engaging with them.

While talking with Dhriti and Anvi, they couldn't help but bring up the subject of my relationship with Sharvansh. Dhriti asked, "So how's it going between you and Ar... I mean, Rana Sa?"

I responded coldly, "I hate him, just as much as he hates me. Our marriage is nothing more than a public spectacle. There's no love or affection between us."

Anvi then brought up the topic of my past feelings, saying, "But Aaru, you liked him, right?"

I clarified, "I used to like him, but not anymore. After everything that's happened, I've lost any affection I had for him, and I think it's better that way. I don't want to waste my feelings on someone like him."

Dhriti expressed concern, saying, "But Aaru, you can't live like that forever."

I assured her, "I have a solution for that. Don't worry."

As I was chatting with my friends, Reyansh came over and informed me that Dadi Sa wanted to see me. I nodded at him and told the girls, "Wait for me here; I'll be back in a few minutes."

I joined Rana Sa next to Dadi Sa in the temple, where the Holi celebrations were in full swing. Dadi Sa declared, "Rana Sa, it's time to apply color to your wife."

Rana Sa took a small amount of colored powder in his hand and, without any display of emotion, applied it to my cheek. His touch left a lingering warmth on my skin, but our eyes remained as cold as ever. I showed no emotion, mirroring his indifferent demeanor. The vibrant color did little to change the atmosphere between us.

This ceremonial gesture was merely a formality in our relationship, just like the rest of our arranged marriage.

Dadi Sa instructed me to apply the color next, but added, "Nahi, aap apne haath use nahi kar sakti." I looked at Rana Sa, who didn't provide any guidance. It was Reyansh's teasing remark that helped me understand that I needed to be creative.

(No, you can't use your hands.)

I hesitated for a moment, my mind flashing back to the haldi incident, the way his hands had moved over my body, igniting tingling sensations within me. I gestured for him to come closer, but he stood there, unresponsive. Growing irritated, I rose on my toes and pulled his collar with one hand, smearing color from my cheek to his, then immediately took a couple of steps back.I couldn't understand what possessed me to perform such an act. My heart was racing, and the thumping was almost deafening. His throat-clearing brought me back to reality. "Um, Aaradhya, chaliye, hume kuch logon se milna hai."

(Aaradhya, shall we, we have to meet some people.)

I nodded, not wanting to refuse him in front of Dadi Sa and Dada Sa.