Dear Bully (UNEDITED)

19

Dear Bully, 

I was forced to go to school this morning, yet again. I was dreading going to class because of you and your 'mates'. Don't you know how scared I am of you? I try and act strong but you always find a way to get through that barrier and hurt me. 

This morning was as bad as every other day. I knew not to come today. 

The silence when I had walked into class for the first period of the day was overwhelming and I knew something was wrong than it usually was. You Xavier, seemed too casual to not be up to something. You were just staring out the window with your arms behind your head as if nothing was happening but I could see one of your friends looking at me, as if waiting for me to do or say something.

I only realised what was happening when I went to my desk and sat down on my chair. That's when the farting sound erupted in the silent room. Thinking about the situation this morning though, I realised I was too busy trying to figure out why everyone was staring at me in complete silence that I didn't even notice the whoopie cushion.

Everyone in my class laughed and called me a 'dumb slut'. No one bothered to stick up for me, not that I was expecting that anyway. If I couldn't stick up for myself, there was no way other people would either. 

Did you know my eyes were filling up with tears? I couldn't see anyone because it was so blurry. 

Your face is something that I always remember. Even though I was close to tears this morning, you were smirking and your eyes held amusement. I'm still contemplating whether I saw your eyes soften as soon as your brown eyes looked into mine. Was that was just my imagination? 

I had run out the classroom door, covering my mouth to stop the sobs from escaping with the teacher yelling at the students and at me to come back. 

No one came to help. 

No one came for me. 

Not even the teacher. 

I still feel embarrassed about that. Besides embarrassment, I feel hate for you. So much hate that I wished...I wished you would die. 

How low am I, huh? Now I'm as bitter and as spiteful as you. Writing this down in my diary, I feel like we're going around in circles. 

When will you ever change? 

Love, Anjana.