Judge Me

S1E3: All We Do Pt.3

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S1E3: All We Do Pt. 3

"Can't stop the feeling! (Got this feeling in my body)...."

- J. Timberlake 'Can't Stop The Felling'

Jax gave me his helmet and I thanked him as I put it on. He climbed on and I followed clutching him tightly around the waist.

Just like old times.

"That tight enough, darlin'?"

"Perfect."

"Alright then."

We sped off and somehow just being with him and on his bike as if nothing had changed made me feel so much better.

-

I laughed as he told me about how last night made him worry about my mental health. We sat on a park bench with a blunt being passed between the two of us. I didn't usually smoke but since I was taking risks, I might as well.

"Okay, I'm sorry about the crazy drunk call but I think most of it was really truth that I would have been hella scared to say sober."

"So you really feel that way about me?"

"Eight years ago, you told me that I took on challenges even when I was scared. I guess that was one of my moments," I shrugged letting the smoke gather up into a cloud over my head as I tried to keep my eyes off of him. It was very hard. Very, very hard. "But when I found out that you have a wife and a-"

"Had a wife," he stopped me.

I finally looked at him. Okay the wife thing that had been eating me up was now forgotten but there was a real life baby that he was a father to. I didn't know if I could handle anymore.

"She's the mother to my son, but we aren't together anymore. I met her and she took my mind off of all the women I was losing in my life."

"Like Tara...."

"Tara was the first girl to make me slow down a bit but she's not built for the club life. That's why she got out before I could drag her in," Jax shrugged as he took the blunt and put it to his lips.

I didn't hate Tara. I hated the closeness she could easily have with Jax. Being white.... Being everything that I wasn't....

"I heard you got MJ's old Harley."

"Yeah, it's so amazing. I remember the first ride I actually had on a Harley was with you," My smile was genuine as I pushed back my straightened hair. Jax flicked the blunt down and got off the park bench. "You told me horses were better, remember?", Jax lifted me up sliding an arm around my waist to pull me closer to him.

I shoved him a little playfully.

"I see one fine stallion right in front of me and I haven't had the pleasure of riding him."

"What happened to little Miss Catholic?"

"She left the moment I traded in my Mary Janes for leather boots. Are you going to make me work for it?"

Jax's laugh sent chills through my body but I didn't let it stop me from grabbing him by the front of his Samcro hoodie and smashing our lips together.

-

Jax's body was so warm and I realized that I wasn't even naked. All I can remember from our time in his dorm was that I started questioning him about how many girls he had gotten lucky with in this room.