Obsessed To Her Only

Chapter 13

Natalie's P.O.V

Irina was my best friend, my soul sister, my other half. There are very few people I love to death, my parents, my brother and her. She was my friend since I was 12 years old. Ashley and Victoria became our friends later that year.

Irina was always there for me. People envied us because of the way we supported each other. She was such a soul sister that she would instantly understand my mood and thoughts. I didn't even have to tell her. She would just look at me and would tell the exact thoughts of my mind. Every passing year our friendship was getting stronger.

We did a lot of things together, our first tour to Paris, our first club night, our driving session. We were two school going girls notorious for our little mischievous acts.

But she was gone! A person who was everything to me in my teenage, a time when all you need is a good friend, a girl who guided me in every step of my life, that light was gone.

She was bold, strong, confident, beautiful and a girl with a golden heart. But...

She committed suicide!

Yes a girl with everything in her plate committed suicide. She fell in love with a guy and that was her biggest fault. Xavier was our senior in high school. He was rich, handsome and a dream boy of every girl in our class.

It was a love at first sight for her. She tried to deny the attraction she felt towards him but it was of no use. She was desperate for him so instead of beating around the bush she asked him out. He accepted luckily because obviously who would reject a pretty girl. They started dating and she fell more for him. She was desperately, extremely and passionately in love with him. But it was not that serious for Xavier. He never made any promises for future which was a honest thing to do unlike other guys. But she was gone too far to return.

He was everything for her. So instead of making her more desperate he told her to breakup. She was devastated at the thought of not being with him. She tried to cope up with the situation but she couldn't move on.

A girl who was stronger than anyone I knew was breaking into pieces but I couldn't do anything. It was barely a month after their breakup and I saw her crying all the time. She literally begged Xavier to take her back but he told her he isn't looking for something serious as he's just in high school. He had a valid point too but she didn't think straight that time.

Then we heard that he had started dating some junior. I knew he was doing it for Irina so that she could move on but it had the opposite effect on her.

A day before her death she talked to me just like we used to in old times before Xavier, before everything. She told me how I meant so much to her and I was just like her sister and she would be very happy when in future I would get married, have kids and all.

She was 1 year older than me so she always had this protective side over me and when she told me all that I didn't feel strange and told her the same. Never in my wildest imaginations I had thought that it was our last time sitting together so happily. A day before that night was my 18th birthday and she spent all day with me and I thought thank God finally my old Irina is back.

We talked all night. It was the best time ever... remembering every great moment of our life that we shared together. I slept early like always because I was still tired because of my birthday party.

I woke up at 11am suddenly which was still early. I had this feeling that something bad was going to happen. I felt anxious extremely and when I looked at my left I couldn't find Irina either which made me even more worried.

I went down the stairs dad was gone for a business meeting and mom was still in kitchen making something. I asked her where Irina went and she told me she just informed her that she had to go somewhere urgently. Just when I was about to call her my phone started ringing.

"Nat.. Natalie pp..please come fast I want to see yy..you." she spoke on the other line. I could tell she was having trouble breathing.

"Irina? What's wrong? Why do you sound like that? Where are you?" I was desperately shaking my head I knew there was something wrong.

"At our usual horse riding club". She barely spoke and ended the call.

My heart was beating crazily. I was numb for a minute and then without even changing my clothes and just grabbing a scarf from my couch I walked towards main gate. I told my driver to take me to that arena. It was barely a 10 minute ride and I reached there.

I was running without giving a damn about people staring at me. I went to our usual spot and what I saw there was something that still haunts me in my nightmares.

She was sitting on the ground with a knife on her left wrist. Xavier was standing near him. When she saw me she instantly cut her wrist. The cut was so deep that in a second she was completely covered in blood. I was watching all of this but I couldn't move, she was looking at me with hurt in her eyes. Xavier was calling an ambulance and was yelling in frustration but all I felt was numbness.

When Xavier saw me he came to me, shrugged my shoulders and told me to go to her as she was calling me. After a minute coming out of some trance I ran towards her. I hugged her very tightly I was wearing a scarf. I immediately covered her wrist with that. I told her she was going to be fine and she needs to stay with me. But her next words were like a bombshell to me.

"No Natalie I don't want to live anymore. I've over dosed myself with poison I don't need an ambulance. I love you please forgive me."

I slapped her. I was crying and yelling at her, "Just shut up okay just shut up. please stay with me. You'll be fine nothing is going to happen to you. Please Irina please don't go you're my family I can't live without you Please stay God please! .....Xavier pick her up we're going to hospital in my car."

She caressed my cheeks lightly and I saw white foam coming out of her mouth. Poison was affecting on her. Then she spoke for the last time with tears all over her face,

"I can't take this anymore. Don't blame him I've loved Xavier. Please forgive me."

Then I felt her hand slipping away from my face to the ground. I shook her body screamed her name told her to talk to me, told her to open her eyes but she was long gone.

I was hypnotized. It all looked like it was a dream but it was real. A reality that made me vow to myself to never fall in love with someone, never care for someone so deeply again.

I didn't cry after that I waited until her burial. When she was buried deep down in ground. The realization started to hit me hard. I could never see her, could never talk to her, could never hear her voice again. Then all I remembered was the hate I had towards Xavier.

He waited for a day and came to my house to apologize to me. I could see he was devastated... dark bags underneath his eyes, pale face, crying like a kid. But it didn't effect me at all and then he begged me for forgiveness and I remembered Irina, she begged him too to take her back. He was out of control crying and yelling like a maniac I could see the guilt in his eyes... No use now. I slapped him repeatedly and told him to never see me again otherwise I would kill him myself.

It took me a whole year to get out of depression but it made my personality dark. I am never going to fall for a guy I keep repeating it in my head. After that I've dated a lot. None of my relationships lasted longer than a month. My parents also arrange dates for me every now and then but it never works out. It's always me who calls it quit and I am determined to stay the same...

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I was totally tearing up writing this chapter. Anybody else? :(