-thirtytwo-

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--thirtytwo-

HE FOUND ME down by the creek again, but I didn't want to see him

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HE FOUND ME down by the creek again, but I didn't want to see him. 

I had missed breakfast and avoided being caught by a guard, so it was only a matter of time before one of my friends finally realized where I would be. 

I had expected Patrick to be the one, although, he had never be down here with me; I don't think he even knew there was a creek in The Dormir - most people didn't, but after his revelation of truth, I had assumed that things would change between us. 

When I turned around, he was walking over to me: MiKinley. He smiled, but I couldn't return it because all my energy was spent worrying about the boy he despised. The boy he would have done anything to get rid of. 

I knew that he was probably extremely joyed to have seen Charleston be taken away, and it was for that reason that I was angry at him. For a moment, though, I wondered if it was the truth; if it really was why I felt that way towards him. A few seconds passed by; or was I just angry that he wasn't Charleston?

I silenced the questions in my head as he came stood about a metre to my side from where I was perched on the rocks. His eyes were on me, they burned in my skin. I ignored him. 

"How are you doing down here?"

My toes were in the water: it was the only coldness that reminded me of him, of Charleston, because I felt alive. With him gone, maybe this would be the only way I could feel that way again.

"We missed you at breakfast." 

He would keep speaking until I finally said something. I knew that he would. He was persistent and stubborn, but he also never quit on people - something I had admired in him until now. 

He sat down with a heavy sigh. Although covered by clouds, the brightness of the sky caused him to squint as he gazed out upon the running water. It was as though the world was suddenly beautiful to him again, now that he wasn't around. 

We were slowly becoming opposites. 

"Are you okay? I tried to find you earlier, after you fainted, but I didn't see you again. What happened?" 

I hated the way he expected an answer from me - how it was as though he thought that I would tell him anything if he asked. That he thought he deserved to hear everything. More than that, though, I hated the way he was so far from how I knew him to be. 

"It's the stress, isn't it." MiKinley didn't say it like a question. He said it as if he was answering it on my behalf. I shivered in trapped frustration. 

"Ever since the Harvest you've been so paranoid. Ever since he tried to touch you." 

"Is that why you did it?" I caught him off guard. Or maybe I just confused him. He didn't seem to know what I was talking about. 

"Did what, Pip?" 

"You know what." 

He seemed guilty for a moment, but it wasn't long enough. Pride took over him, then he started defending his actions, getting annoyed that I felt something different that what he felt. 

"Stop being so blind, Pip. Wake up, okay? He's gone, you don't have to be afraid anymore, he can't do anything to you. You've got me." 

Sometimes you can understand what people think of you by what they don't say. What they chose to leave out. For instance, MiKinley described me very specifically without using the actual word it was that he was calling me. 

A paradox: if I really was what he thought of me: stupid, then I wouldn't have known it was what he was trying to say.

"Did you ever stop to think about why we aren't allowed to touch, Kin? Why it would kill us? What about how?" 

He rolled his eyes, and that was his answer: cowardice. He was too afraid for the 'what if's', too afraid to think about the consequence, about what would happen if his hold world turned out to be a lie. 

"Why can't you forget him? He ruined us. Pip, he tried to kill you." 

"No. You're wrong. You have to be." 

With desperation - as if my life depended on it, he asked again. "Why can't you forget him?"

"Because he gives me hope!" It came out of me like thunder, like it was demanding to be heard. I adjusted my words. "Gave me... He gave me hope." 

-thirtytwo--

Thank you for 11K!

I miss Charleston already.

I miss who MiKinley was before.

Please comment! What are your favourite parts to read about - Pip and Charleston? Pip and Kin? Ava and Thea? I've got something HUGE planned for the next few chapters.

Also, where are you guys from? I'm curious to see where my book is being read. I'm from England/Australia (constantly migrating between the two).

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who could ever be against us?

Romans 8:31.

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