The Beau & the Beast

63 - My Life

With anger rushing through my body, I stormed into Clocksworth's room and slammed the door behind me.

"He's brainwashed her!" I hissed and began to wander back and forth in the room without casting the slightest glance at him. "How the hell could my life turn into this fucking chaos? Like the worst horror movie, the ones that are full of idiots!"

"So she knew about it." Clock noted calmly and exhaled a thick cloud of cigar smoke.

"Obviously!" I hissed. "She even found the location for him!" I felt his eyes follow me and it annoyed me so I decided to stand right in front of him and spread out my arms. "So what do we do now?"

He shrugged and took a puff on the cigar. "We'll think of a new plan."

His calmness had the opposite effect on me and I felt impatience burning inside me. "Theo!" I exclaimed almost desperately.

"What? Are you in a hurry?" He wondered with the usual questioning expression with the raised eyebrow, the wrinkle between the eyes, the amused look and the crooked smile. Damn he was so fucking sexy.

"Yes." I muttered sourly like a kid and suddenly I was thrown back into some dejavu experience to a time when we were fussing about life in a similar way.

"Okay, then we'll confront him." He said briefly, "We'll give him an ultimatum."

With a sigh, I sank down on the edge of his desk. "Do you think it'll work?"

"No." He said unamused.

"So what's plan B?"

"We can imprison him."

I stared at him with wide-open eyes and sarcastically muttered. "Good luck."

He came forward and stood close, maybe a little too close but I said nothing about it. "I know what I'm doing, Little One." He whispered and put his hand on my shoulder and I looked up at him with questioning eyes, but I still said nothing. "But I need your help." He continued and stood a little closer, but I didn't answer.

All I could do was nod a little, while I felt his hand move up to my neck, his fingertips stroked my soft neck hairs before they moved towards my jaw and soon his thumb moved slightly over my chin and up on my lips.

My whole body was shaking, but not from discomfort. On the contrary. And then it happened. His mouth was pressed against mine, it happened so fast that I didn't have a chance to react. But it didn't matter, even if it happened slowly, I would still have welcomed it. I parted my lips and met his tongue with the same longing and passion as his. My fingers tangled in his newly cut hair, and suddenly I missed the long curls.

His hands on my body, his lips against mine felt so familiar but still so foreign. And suddenly I realised what I was doing. Fuck, this was wrong. I had to stop! The thought hit my heart and I quickly put my palms against his chest and pressed him back and to my relief he did not resist in the slightest.

"I can't." I whispered.

"I know." He sighed and smiled a sad smile. "I should have come back sooner."

"Yes." I answered and got up to leave.

"Do you love him?"

The question hung in the air for a while until I turned around and answered a short but honest, "Yes."

He nodded a few times before walking around the desk and sitting in the chair to light a new cigar. "I'll be talking to Lu tonight, so prepare your gang for Plan B."

I nodded and mumbled, "Okay." Before I left him and ran to my bedroom with tears burning behind my eyes.

With a bleeding heart, I picked up the phone and flipped through the names in the address book before I found the right one. Conor.

Three signals went off before he answered. "What have you done now, Princess?" The voice sighed on the other end of the line. Damn his voice was so deep and hot.

"Hello." I mumbled weakly after a moment of silence.

"Answer my question." He muttered as if he expected me to be huddled in a dungeon with silver around my ankle. That wasn't the case, but sometimes it felt like it.

"I just wanted to talk." told him after my thoughts had fallen silent.

"So, my guess is, the cute boyfriend left you."

"No ... or ... not yet." I sighed, "I'm kinda the biggest idiot ever."

"I knew that already." He said in a way that I could hear him grinning on the other side.

"If I leave France, can I move back in with you?" I wondered as my imagination wandered to leave everything and just start over again.

"Running from your problems won't fix anything, Doll. You should know this by now." I heard him say even though the wind was blowing into the microphone, he must be out and about, I thought. "But yes, Love, you know you can." We were silent for a long time and all that was heard was his footsteps moving on some gravelly surface. "Was that all?" He finally said, a little amused.

"I guess..." I sighed, "I guess I needed to hear your voice."

He chuckled out a, "Yeah?"

With a sigh, I threw myself on the bed and landed on my back. "Do you know why I love you so much Conor?"

I don't know if he actually thought about the question, or if he was waiting for me to continue, or if he was actually a little put off by the fact that I asked, because he was silent for quite a long time before he answered. "No."

"Because you say what you think and show what you feel without wrapping it up." I explained but was met with more silence. "I mean, of course it can hurt sometimes but you are honest and I really appreciate that."

"It's nice to know that someone appreciates me." He laughed a little dryly but stopped abruptly. "Hey Babe, I need to hang up." He sighed and I suspected that he was standing in front of someone or something that annoyed him, I could hear it in his voice.

"Okay." I sighed without trying to hide my disappointment. "Take care of yourself Conor."

"You know where to find me." He replied before I heard the click confirming that he'd hung up on me.

Okay Belmont, I sighed to myself, you need to decide what the hell are you going to do with your life?