Why me? (Austin Mahone)

Chapter 60

Chapter 60

Another day goes by with no signs of Austin. The difference today being that none of the crew are at school either.

I don't think it's a coincidence they're all missing. I know this has to be something related to Brad, and since I am around him, I am not to be trusted with any of their plans anymore. I've even thought about talking to Alex about this, but I am pretty sure Austin has already talked to all of them about our situation. They probably think I am a bitch for betraying them... If they only knew I am doing this for Jake.

I feel like I need to see Austin, it's an urge to know he's okay, to know that he doesn't completely hate me.

In the last fight we had just two nights ago, he told me he was the one leaving this time, that he knew how poor my choices were, and that I was wrong. And he is right, I am deathly wrong. I have tried to help others but ended up ruining them in the process; I've lied to him in order to protect him. Isn't he the one who always protects me? Who looks up for me? Why am I protecting him now then? He knows how to deal with these sabotaging situations way better than I do.

If he were in this position, in the one where he would have to choose between letting me think he doesn't love me anymore or putting me in danger, would he do it? Would he leave me like I left him?

My head was clouded by possible ideas and alternate universe situations.

I know he would. He would do this for me, just like I am doing this for him.

I needed to see him so badly, maybe not talk to him, but at least catch a glimpse of him at the hall, laughing with his friends, heading to his next classroom.

Sometimes I wonder. Have I ruined him? Is it possible that he was living a simpler and happier life when I was not in it? Am I the cause of all that hurt pilling up inside him?

I took my books and headed to the parking lot. No matter how long I would've waited for him to show up, he wouldn't; and I was in no position to be waiting for him to do so, not anymore.

I got home to an empty house and an empty stomach. With no one around, I decided to order something to eat; a pizza sounded like the best idea.

Austin's favorite food. My mind painfully reminded me.  I pushed the thought aside and went upstairs.

I opened the door to my room and almost jumped to my bed before I saw a box laying on it. I stopped dead on my tracks and stared at it.

I turned to the window next to my bed, it was indeed opened, but since the attack on Chloe weeks ago it has bars on it.

My mind instantly thought of Austin being behind this, and my stomach started twirling like a little girl's.

It was a brown square box with a folded card on top. It read 'Ashley' on the outside with a messy handwriting. I placed it aside without even reading the inside and took the box in my hands. I slowly pulled the top off trying to contain a stupid smile that only lasted two seconds before it wore off.  

Inside the box was a dress, a beautiful long peachpuff dress with little stones encrusted on the top. I took the dress out of the box and laid it on the bed before taking the little note again, this time reading the inside.

"Thought I could pick the dress instead of the corsage. Brad"

I stared blankly at the note, every drop of hope being drained out of me, and then stared at the dress. How I wished this was a different situation, one where I could be excited. The only thing I felt right then was disappointment. I don't know why I expected this box to be from Austin, I just did; it has become an instinct of mine to relate him to every single thing that happens to me.