Chapter 20. Ming's Past.

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Ming was waiting at the foot of the stairs. He gave me a nervous smile, which I returned.

"I'm sorry Ming. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I was angry and just lashed out."

"I knew you were not happy," he replied as he took my hands in his. "It was that glare you gave River. It was obvious you were hurting, but I couldn't do anything about it. It was all because Pond wanted me to talk with River to see what else he let slip. Surely you must know that I would never want to hurt you like that, don't you?"

We then hugged. I squeezed him hard fighting back the tears that were starting to form. Had he seen my jealousy too? Is it that obvious now?

"Get a room, why don't you?" A drunken voice slurred.

It was Golf.

"I just knew you were at it," he continued. "You don't make friends with fags unless you're after the benefits."

He staggered and tried to focus on me, swaying from side to side. "So that's the real reason you fell out with Pang. She can't give you what he can, can she? Are you that desperate to take it up the arse that you have fallen for his tricks? Is that what you're planning to get up to tonight?"

"Piss off Golf ..... You're drunk and spouting rubbish," I replied angrily. "You just don't have a clue!"

Golf staggered towards me, pointing his finger in my face. "Don't even think of inviting him upstairs. I'm not having you getting it while I'm trying to sleep below you.... you fucking fag."

Ming stepped in and pushed him away. "You're in no condition to back up your insults or threats. Come and repeat it when you are sober."

Golf staggered backwards as he tried to focus on Ming. All it took was another small push from Ming to Golf's forehead and he ended up on his backside on the floor.

Ming grabbed my arm. "Come on Earth. No arguments..... You're coming back to my room."

I didn't put up any struggle. Not that I intended to. In fact I quite liked his assertiveness. Karn's parting words to me of 'tell him you like him' were now foremost in my mind.

I sheepishly followed Ming into his room, and just stood there as he poured us both some water.

"Well?" He asked as he handed me the glass. "Why did you get angry with me?"

I just looked at the floor.

"If I didn't know better, I would have thought you were jealous of the attention River was giving me."

I looked up at him and then back down at the floor.

"You were jealous, weren't you?" He suggested softly. There was a tenderness to the tone of his voice. It wasn't a jibe but a question of concern.

I looked back at him again and could just barely nod in the affirmative, before looking back down at the floor.

Ming took my glass of water from me and put it down on the unit beside him.

He hugged me again. "At last you are being honest with yourself. Pond told me that you were struggling with your feelings when he first told me about saving you. There was another boy he could have asked to befriend you, but he said he chose me because he trusted me not to pressurise you or to make you feel even more uneasy or uncomfortable. This is why I had to insist that we spoke tonight. Pond would have been angry with me for upsetting you, even though I was only doing what he asked."

"He told me that he saw in my heart that I was gay. I argued with him and told him that I wasn't. I don't think of myself as gay. I honestly believed I was straight. It was only when I met you that day that I began to have different thoughts. I still have them. I am not sure what I really feel. All I know is that I think I like you. I think about you more than I have thought about anyone else before.... even Pang, but as for sleeping with you..... I haven't thought that far forward yet, and I'm still very confused. I certainly don't want to try doing it just yet."

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