The audience were seated and we're all sat whispering and taking photos of the set from their seats whilst the panelists and I sat awaiting for the filming to start. I say straightening my shirt out whilst make up assistants powdered our cheeks lightly. Eventfully, the cameras got ready and it was show time.
RUNNING TITLES
Rob:
Good evening, and welcome to Would I Lie To You, the show with the fondness for fibs. On David Mitchell's team tonight; the new writer of Doctor Who and Kentish sweetheart and Mrs Cumberbatch-to-be - It's Claudia Digby.
APPLAUSE
Rob:
And Eight Out Of Ten Cats member and team leader of Eight Out Of Ten Cats, it's Sean Lock.
APPLAUSE
Rob:
And on Lee Mack's team tonight, he's a comedian who finds nothing funny.
Romesh
*shoots a glare at Rob*
Rob:
Point proven, it's Romesh Ranganathan.
APPLAUSE
Rob:
Have you ever wondered what Cliff Richards and a Ravens baby would look like? Look no further, it's Noel Fielding.
APPLAUSE
Rob:
And so we'll begin with Round One Home Truths, where our panelists each read out a statement from the card in front of them. To make things harder, they've never seen the card before. They have no idea what they are face with and its up to the opposing team to sort the fact from the fiction. Claudia is first up tonight.
Claudia:
*picks up the card in front of me and I read aloud* I was once chased by a pig.
Rob:
Right, so Lee's team-
Romesh:
Right, first things first, where were you? Were you at a farm or at a petting zoo?
Claudia:
Neither of those, Romesh. I was at home, in Margate and I had taken my dogs out for a walk. I had my earphones in and on my phone playing Pokemon Go when all of a sudden, a huge pig was at the top of my road!
Lee:
Did you know it was a pig instantly?
Claudia:
No, I originally thought it was a German Shepard from a distance so I went to approach it to find out it was a pig. It wasn't a cute little pig but instead the hairy ones with tusks! It wasn't the nicest of animals...
Noel:
Why wasn't it nice?
Claudia:
Because it was after my dogs. He wanted to fight my dogs and I wasn't having any of that so I ran into the doctor's wife's house and the pig was charging after us, growling and kicking his feet. He then tried to head butt the door down.
Romesh:
What did you do next?
Claudia:
I called the police.
Lee:
Talk us through the police phone call.
Claudia:
Okay. Rob, could you be the police officer on the phone? Then it won't make me look mad!
YOU ARE READING
Benedict Cumberbatch: Life With Ben
Teen FictionThis is a story about a girl who has lived every fangirls dream; to marry and grow old with their idols. Benedict's wife Claudia, has took it upon herself to tell the world the truth about the British heartthrob, with the help of diary entries, pic...
