Salubrious (Jason McCann)

Chapter 35

Malarie's POV

Two days later: Monday

"So you still haven't really told me where Jason actually is." My mother speaks from the passenger side of the car, while I drive to the children's school. "Mom he's just on a little vacation for his anger issues." I give her a short answer, turning into the crowded parking lot of the kids private school.

"So you have to watch all of y'all children, the children who are partly his? One being just his, and not yours. That's not fair Malarie." Mom tells me like it is, with me nodding. "I know mom, I know." I answer her, thinking about what she's saying.

I know it's not fair; I've tried to make him stay home. He simply doesn't listen to anything I have to say. I mean, I'm sure he would've stayed if I said I had a man coming over, but why would I put myself in that position? He would literally try everything in his book to make me confess I'm cheating on him, then it'd just turn into a huge argument between us two. I haven't spoken to him since yesterday afternoon, and what we did wouldn't even be categorized as talking.

All we did was disagree, raise our voices, say mean things to each other, and oh yeah, disagree with one another again. I didn't want to hear anymore, so as soon as I put the children on the phone, his loud voice turned into a sweet one, and he was 'Daddy Jason', again. He always straightens out his anger, or shitty mood towards me, whenever our children are present. It's the same thing with me; when I'm upset at him, I'll pretend to be okay. Its only because we don't want to worry our children.

Apart from our disagreements, I am happy he suggested I stay at my parents house. I know it has to be crowded with all of us here, yet they do not complain. It was only supposed to be my family visiting, but they decided to make it like a family reunion type thing. So they invited Greg, his girlfriend and his daughter. Along with Jessa and her husband.

I was extremely happy to see my family, and actually be reunited with them. It felt just like old times, apart from me having kids, and my parents being called grandma and grandpa. My dad still can't believe he's a grandpa, but hey, he has to get over it. I absolutely love how my family is mixed in, I think that's what I love the most. I wonder if Jason's part black. Nah, but he acts like it, so that's pretty close.

"Malarie I know you may feel as if you have to be by your man's side, but know, it's okay to put your foot down and say no. I'm tired of seeing you stressed out. You're twenty one with four children, practically taking on another one. You haven't lived, and I feel like your life has started way too earlier." I look at my mom shaking her head sadly, giving me a sympathetic look. "I see what you're saying, and that's exactly how I feel most of the time. I'm not going to say I regret having my children, because God knows I don't. I just wish I would've had them a little later in my life. I feel like Jason hijacked my life- my teenage years, and just got me pregnant so he'd always have me. I love him so much, but I know him loading me up with kids is his way of tying me down. I know it is, because he doesn't want me to do anything. I bet if we didn't have our kids right now, he'd be even more possessive over me. It's like he doesn't want me out of his sight." I vent out all what I've been keeping bottled up, just wanting someone to listen to me.

"When he comes back, I think you should tell him how you feel. Even if he doesn't want to hear it, still tell him what you're feeling inside, Malarie. You have bags under your eyes, you look tired, which is from you not getting your proper rest. You may be older now, but you'll always be my little baby, and I care about my children." Mom sighs sadly, rubbing a bag under my eye. "I'll tell him." That's all I say, before I get out of the car.

I make sure to close the door lightly, not wanting to scare Jasper and Ariel Rose, with the loud slamming noise. They absolutely hate loud sounds... especially loud voices. I make my way into the school, not wanting to be a minute later. Jacob gets bored fast, and he'd mess with anyone out of boredom. I never wait for my children to come to car, I always feel the need to go inside to pick them up. Plus, it's mandatory to pick up children in preschool and kindergarten. I'm also so happy Jason took initiative to enroll Joel in school, seeing Christine wanted to wait to do it. If Jason would've waited on her slow ass, only God knows how long it could've been before Joel was in school.