Love in rodeo

Chapter Thirty Six

You ask me what the most uncomfortable feeling is and I'm gonna say wearing a dress. Wearing a dress and having to stand in front of not only my family but also a camera that's taking pictures of everyone, all day, every minute.

Fanning my palms down the front of my dress I  looked back at a mirror that stood in the hallway. My hair was curled in the tightest curls I've seen. Each curl pinned into a beautiful display of blond on my head. The dresses that Cory's soon to be wife, Jackie, had chosen were not bad.

They were a beautiful dark red that reminded me of the leaves in autumn. Although it was a sweetheart neckline the lace of sleeves kept the show of cleavage down especially on the bigger boobed bridesmaids. The dress was not a lengthy dress but rather short since it ended a little bit after mid thigh.

Which I wasn't complaining about the length at all since the wedding reception had been outside and the sun decided it wanted to heat Mother Earth today. Glad that the reception was over all the guest, including me and the people in the wedding, had escaped into the dinning hall where there was AC.

"You look fabulous" A pair of arms laced around my waist causing a smile to form across my lips. Gripping the hands that locked at my stomach I leaned back into the strong body.

"You don't look too bad yourself in a tux" spinning around in his arms I yanked gently on Jack's tie.

His smile brightened my day better then the sun as he goofed off with the tie as if I messed it up.

"Thank you. Just feel weird without a hat or something" Jack's eyes left the mirror to glance back down to me. Nodding my head I agreed. I could definitely use my cameo ball cap and all the hair pins out of my head.

"May!" Jack's hands slowly slid off of my waist as I turned to find Cory's now wife smiling at me.

"Ops I didn't mean to interrupt you two but May I'd like some pictures of just me and you. A request from Cory and from me" Jackie was slightly shy and I could tell she was nervous about the request. Sliding Jack's hands off of me the rest of the way i nodded and headed over to Jackie.

"Catch you on the dance floor cowboy" I sent a wink at Jack before linking my arm with Jackie's to go get some pictures.

*****

Lazily I pulled my self to my assigned table and sat down with a thud. My cheeks hurt from smiling, my feet hurt from these god damn heels I some how managed to walk in, and my back hurt from being on my feet all day.

Jack chuckled as he took a swig out of whatever he was drinking for the night. My cousin Brandon, who was the best man, and his wife sat at our table as well.

Yes normally bridesmaids and best man sit with the bride and groom but Cory and Jackie were not normal. They had their table by the dance floor where they sat and talked with each other in solitude.

"You alright there cous?" Brandon chuckled as I slouched back in my chair very un lady like.

"I hurt. And pictures with Jackie? We all know I'm not too happy about losing my favorite cousin who could be like a brother to me to some woman I barely know. And now they have pictures of me with her" The whole table erupted in laughs sending my blood a boiling.

I don't see Cory often but I've seen the changes in him. I've seen other girls break his heart and I know this one is different for him. Yet even when I got the invite to the wedding I couldn't help but let my heart fall. Cory was my oldest 1st cousin and a big brother in my eyes. He gave me hell but he also cared about me and I knew he loved me. But to watch him get married and know that I'd see less of him made my heart crack just a little bit more.

"Well how do you think Cory feels about Jack? The way you're feeling about this wedding isn't a one sided deal May" Brandon's voice was sorta hard to hear over the loud music that was now pumping through the speakers but I understood. I understood enough to shut my angry mouth shut and look away.

"Cory loves you May and it's hard to see you bring a boy that might be a complete scoundrel. No offense Jack" Jack waved off my 3rd cousin as Brandon reached for my hand across the table. It was very unlike him to seem loving in any way towards me.

"But isn't it nice to see him happy with her? I know Cory's happy to see you with Jack just as I am and the whole family" Brandon's eyes drifted off behind me as I heard a cough.

Turning in my chair I found Cory fixing his tie awkwardly. I smiled up at my cousin as he reached his hand out as an offering.

"May I have this dance?" Cory put on a pathetic fake accent as I giggled and placed my hand in his.

"While you most certainly can sir" Cory lead me into the dance floor where we both stepped into a slow four step.

"I know what you're thinking" Cory cut right into talking as I slowly evaporated into the moment.

I ignored Cory's words and the confusion they brought to my mind but instead let myself get swept away as Cory gave me a twirl. If my memory serves me right Cory had once done this to me when he was a teen and I was barely seven at another wedding. Me and Cory were a good eight years difference but I was always more mature.

I set my forehead down on his shoulder as our hands stayed locked in each other's. Cory always had some colon on that always reminded me of home. The home where I was originally from and where he still lived. And since Cory was also in the military and played hockey his sent seemed to trigger memories with those things in it.

"I know you weren't happy about this wedding" I kept my head where it was as my face became scarlet.

Cory was the last person i wanted to find out about my unhappiness. This was Cory's night and I was not about ready to ruin this big night for him. So lifting up my head from his shoulder I put my game face on.

"Then you also know it's not my choice if you two got married. Nor is it your job to fret over my fears" the song changed into a different one but me and Cory kept dancing.

"You're my baby cousin so of course it's my job to worry over your fears. Especially if it's a fear I can lay to rest. May I'm not going anywhere" Cory tilted my chin up as my game face faded.

I wasn't as tough as I lead people to believe. I wasn't the strong girl my family believe I was but instead I was still that young woman who's afraid of life and loseing people. Especially people like Cory and my grandpa who I already lost.

"Don't Promise that solider boy. You leave for over seas, you leave for you're wife, you have a life with work and maybe one day a kid Cory. Don't promise your not gonna leave me behind when I'm already fading from your life" my throat swelled with tears I've been trying to hold back since I got the invite in the mail.

Tears not only for Cory but for everyone. For losing my grandfather, for barrel racing, even for Matt who I once thought was a friend. The tears threatened to spill but once again May Smith had to hold herself together.

"You could never fade from my life Kid. We have too many memories that always play in my mind" forgetting we where on a dance floor Cory wrapped me in a tight embrace.

A single tear shed but nothing could break the moment. No one interfered as the music went to an uplifting beat but we didn't move. If anything Cory and I squeezed each other tighter in hopes that this would calm down each other.

"Congrats Cory" I coughed out in a weird laugh now noticing that I never told him that one time today.

"Love you kid"