Chapter 30

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Harry's POV

"Please just take your things and leave my house now." I look at the girl I've slept again this night. Fuck everything. I blame this shit alcohol. I now know that we're done. Lucy wanted to give me a second chance as she stood infront of my house and what am I doing? I ruin everything. My head is still way too confused from this alcohol to think clearly.

"Come on Harry. Look at her. She's nothing against me. What can she even give you?"

"Shut up and leave me house I've said!" I scream at her. Her eyes widen but she takes her things and leaves my room.

"Don't forget our night. You deserve someone better." She says as she finally is out of my house.

Hell no I don't deserve someone better. The best I could have is Lucy.

Lucy's POV

"Jeanette?"

"Yeah?" I hear music in the background of my phone.

"Uhm I have to tell you something."

"What? Sorry I don't understand you. It's way too loud here. I'm at a party."

"Oh. I just wanted to tell you something but it's okay.." I say louder.

"Wait tomorrow is sunday. Usually we could talk there but I'm meeting my friends. We'll see us again on Monday in school, okay? Tell me everything then." I want to say something but she already hung up the phone.

What a great friend I have. She's the only one I thought I had beside of Harry. And I wanted to tell her about Harry.

I have no one. No one is interested in my life. No one will ever care about me. I thought this new school is a beginning but it seems like it will all end like in the old one. I thought Harry made one mistake and he regrets it. Instead he does it again. I can't believe this. Hell how I'm supposed to know if it was just the second time? He could fuck a girl every night.

I can't help myself as I start to cry. I'm alone and such a loser.

Why me? Why did I deserve such a life?

I don't care at this moment if I'm over this but the only thing which can help me right now is cutting. And without a second thought I do it.

This time it's deeper than usual. But it doesn't hurt me. The blood runs down my arm and I feel ashamed and I'm angry at myself.

I take my phone and make a picture of it. I don't know what to think and to do but it feels right.

Harry's POV

My phone wakes me up. I've fallen asleep for an hour. I could have apologized at Lucy for everything but instead I was sleeping. I'm so fucked up.

My head hurts as I take my phone. It's a new message from Lucy.

"Fuck you. We're done" She wrote.

And I can't believe as I see a picture she just sent me.

It's her arm. Blood runs down her wrist. She harmed herself.


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