Pillow Talk

7~ Again and Again

Something had changed in River.

The next day, when we headed out of the house after saying goodbye to the rest of my family, he had started talking about the baby. He had went from silent to rambling on and on about how great of a time he had watching Maya for a few hours.

"Although I'm not sure if I want a girl. That'd be. . . strange." He laughed quietly when we had finally gotten back into town, tapping the steering wheel. I was still too surprised by his sudden change in attitude to take in a lot of what he was saying.

"But it's going to be our kid either way, Carls. My kid." He whispered it slowly, as if he was trying to take everything in.

"River, what if-"

"Stop it with the whole what if thing. Everything is going to be fine. The baby will be perfect, he or she will love you, we'll be great family."

"Why are you being so optimistic?" I whispered, turning to stare out the window.

"Why are you being so pessimistic?" He asked, sounding a little irritated.

"I'm just scared and the hormones and-"

"I get it." He cut me off, smiling as he reached over and squeezed my hand, "Just stop denying that it's happening and we're in this together, Carls."

**

I kept my eyes on the monitor beside me, my heart racing as the doctor said something I couldn't quite hear over my racing heart and the noise of the machine next to me. I could tell by the look in River's eyes that whatever the doctor was saying was good.

". . . in about a month and a half." I caught the end of what she the doctor was saying, my heart slowly fading back to normal.

"Okay. Scarlet, babe. You ready to go?" My head whipped toward River the minute I felt his ice cold hand touch my arm.

"Yeah." I whispered, letting him help me up.

"We get to find out the sex of the baby next month." He said, grinning as I pulled my shirt back down.

Once we were back in the car I accident kicked a bag on the ground and picked it up to see what it was.

"Sperm donor?" I muttered, looking over at River in confusion. He gave me a sheepish smile, reaching for the bag.

"No, no. Tell me why the hell you have this? I mean, I get it if you want to donate it, but why didn't you say anything?" I asked, staring at the empty container.

"Because you weren't really supposed to know, Carls. It's not that important." I snorted, laughing sarcastically.

"Not that important? River, if you donate this, it means somewhere out there you're going to have another kid and-"

"The sperm was for Daisy and Caleb." He blurted, cutting me off, "Your brother can't have kids." The words in my mouth fell dry.

"What? Are you sure? Maybe he-"

"He can't have kids, Carls. I don't know the details and frankly I don't really want to. When I left the other night, I went over to their place. Daisy wants a kid and Caleb was torn apart because he couldn't give one to her." He explained, starting the car.

"You could have told me, River." I finally responded, "I would have understood."

"I didn't think you'd care that much. It really doesn't concern you." I stared at him for a second, shaking my head.