The Monster (My Best Friend Eminem, My Husband Marshall Mathers)

Chapter twenty-eight

Chapter twenty-eight

            Ronnie sat on Marshall’s lap as he watched TV, “Ronnie, don’t sit on dad’s lap he is asleep, let him be” I said. Ronnie slowly and gently got off Marshall’s lap causing his head to move to the side. I giggled to myself as I put a blanket over Marshall. He looked so peaceful at the moment. His chest moved slowly up and down, as little snores came from his throat.

            Sweetly, I placed a small kiss on his temple; turning to Ronnie, putting my finger to my lips to talk softly and don’t make any noises. Ronnie nodded, turning down the TV a notch. I smiled at him, telling him he was doing the right thing.

            Marshall began to moan uneasily as if he was having a nightmare. His face cringed a little and he settled down. It made my heart drop and caused me to feel unsettled. What is he dreaming about? As a wife and mother I always have feel like I should have the upper hand, that I can stop anything from harming this family. But certain things like nightmares are just out of my hands.

            Sometimes I want to get inside my husband’s head, see what he sees, feel what he feels, know what he knows, I know it’s weird to think like that and I never started wanting to do that until after I married Marshall. I just want to know him on other levels sometimes and I wish even more than ever now that he told me what was going on with him now. I know Marshall hasn’t been himself. And I have the feeling I know why, and I can’t leave him I can’t bring myself to leave those girls and him…especially him. The thought left a hole in my heart.

            Marshall began to fidget, uneasy again like another nightmare came back. It was hard to watch, but eventually he woke from his uneasiness and I was at ease once more. He yawned and leaned back into the couch. I smiled how cute he was. A volcano of butterflies burst in my stomach causing me to lose my breath for a moment. I analyzed every feature of my husband’s face and body and how amazing his smile was. His smile was always the thing that captured me, but his way with Ronnie is what turned me on even more. And every worry suddenly vanished.

            The butterflies became heavier as I watched my two boys play together. My breath was gone and all I wanted to do is cozy up to Marshall. I fell in love with my husband all over again. Ronnie goofed around by placing Marshall’s oversized; baseball cap on his small head and running around singing ‘Without Me.’ it was a sight for the video camera. Quickly, I rushed for my phone and began to record my son’s performance.

            Ronnie sagged his pants a little bit and unbuttoned some buttons on his plaid shirt; letting part hang out and switching the baseball cap to the side. He was almost an image of Lil Wayne, but his father’s famous looks and gestures. It had Marshall cracking up and me on the floor holding my sides. Time seemed to stop when I saw Marshall’s wide smile, it was amazing.

            Marshall caught me looking at me and suddenly became serious. The kind of serious as if he was thinking the same thing as I was. You are truly an amazing person. My heart raced faster and my palms began to sweat. Ronnie’s singing and running around seemed to be the least of our concerns, as bad it sounds. His voice went into the back of my mind as Marshall and I continued to stare at each other. He smiled as he blew me a kiss, making the butterflies flutter around my belly and my heart.

            “Mom, I’m going upstairs!” Ronnie said, “Ok, sweetheart.” Ronnie rushed up the stairs leaving Marshall and I downstairs in the living room. The air became tense and I felt every nerve in my body come alive.

“You feeling ok?” Marshall asked softly; loss of breathe.

I regained my poster and my breathing; “Mmmhmm” was all I can say. After much force I crawled in between Marshall’s arms and cuddle up to his chest.