42. Josette Winchester: Ex-Hunter, Mother, Wayward Woman

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42. Josette Winchester: Ex-Hunter, Mother, Wayward Woman

I know I need sleep, but I can't let her go. I don't want to part with her. My little girl, all bundled up in my arms. At least I know she'll sleep, she's out cold. She'd come into this world screaming. Everyone was freaked out when the lights flickered and one of the bulbs shattered. I'll bet that has never happened during a delivery before.

The hospital staff will never know why the lights flickered, but I will. And it wasn't because of demons.

"I can take her, if you want," Cas tells me quietly.

"Now you want to hold her?" I'd offered the chance to Cas when she'd been first born, but he'd declined.

"Like you said, I won't drop her."

I smile. I'd told him that once before, back when he was human, babysitting for a woman he thought he had a chance with. "If you're sure."

"She's my daughter, Josette."

"Alright. Here."

Cas stands up as we exchange our little girl. He sits back down, I see the blankets wiggle a bit. I rest against the bed, feeling my eyes already start to close slightly.

"She's perfect."

"She's ours. Of course she's perfect," I joke. "Our little Fallon."

A knock against the door makes us both turn. Sam looks like hell, but he looks like he's trying to hold it together, for my sake. He looks exhausted and stressed. Once Fallon was born, and once everything was settled, Sam had left the room for a bit. I know why: to grieve for our older brother. Our older brother who would never get to meet his niece, Fallon Celeste Winchester.

I'm glad to see Sam's come back, I was beginning to think he wasn't going to.

"Get some shuteye when you were out there?" I ask Sam.

"Maybe a wink or so." He steps into the room cautiously.

"You should've stayed out there, could've slept better on a couch than one of these uncomfortable chairs."

"Says the woman in the bed."

"My body is sore, Sam. Nothing feels comfortable right now."

"How is she?"

"Sleeping."

"Like her mother should be," Cas scolds me lightly. I stick my tongue out at him. "Once you and the baby are healthy enough, we can get you discharged and..."

I know the word "home" is on the tip of Cas's tongue, but when we look at each other, we know that's not an option right now. Going back to the bunker means going back to the place where echoes of Dean's presence remains. Sam and I aren't ready to go back there. "We'll figure out something."

"I already found your solution," says Sam.

"Did you?"

"Yeah. I got a hold of Jody and told her the news. We talked a little more, and, she offered her place up to you until you find a place of your own."

"Sammy...Thank you."

"Hey, don't thank me, Jody's the one who offered."

Even Sam knows that it's not right for me to return to the bunker. That place isn't baby-proof. A baby shouldn't be there in general. It's not the life that I want for her. "You'll drive me there, right?"

"Of course."

Fallon makes a noise in the blankets, and Cas rocks her lightly in his arms. "If you want to hold her, you might have to fight for her. Cas just took her off my hands."

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