Legacy (Supernatural) [Rogue Trilogy] {3}

43. Life Is One Surprise After the Next

43. Life Is One Surprise After the Next

I'm still not used to this place. I know it's home, but it's not at the same time. I've had many homes in my lifetime: the house in Lawrence, Kansas; the Impala; my place in Rexford, Idaho; the bunker in Lebanon, Kansas.

Now, I have a place of my own. Okay, not technically my own, as I'm renting this place out. The rent is affordable, which works out. I still need spare money for essential things to keep on living.

I've been in this new place for...a few weeks now. I'd spent five months with Jody and the girls, and their hospitality astounded me. About two months into my stay, they'd thrown me a belated baby shower which had brought me to tears. They helped me find a place with a decent rate. Only problem was, was that the place was in another state that wasn't South Dakota.

So, I'm back to home base, in good ole Lawrence, Kansas. No, not in the house where my mother died. The town is a memory enough. Somehow, I feel comfortable in Lawrence. It must be because of Fallon. It has to be. I guess this is some weird way of me having her close to her family even though a lot of it is gone right now.

I'm cleaning a mess up in the kitchen that Sam forgot to clean up. Oh, yeah, I roped my younger brother into this place the first chance I could. He wasn't fond of it, but I think the main reason he stayed was because of his niece. He wouldn't have had incentive otherwise.

I'm sure that's where he is now, in Fallon's nursery. He's been with her any chance that he can get. That's saying more than what Cas has been doing lately, which has been missing in action. Two weeks ago, he'd disappeared on me, left no indication of where he went or why. He hasn't checked in since then.

Naturally, I've been feeling the effects of his disappearance. I haven't slept well, worse than normal. Sometimes I wait for him to pop up and scare the living shit out of me. I wanted it every day since he vanished. Each day I would be disappointed.

At this point, it'll be a miracle if he shows up, because my mind has already considered him a dead angel. Lord only knew what he did to get himself into serious hot water. My guess is that it hadn't been much.

I crack a smile at hearing Fallon scream with laughter from her nursery. The noise, and her alone, make me remember that I chose the right path. Being a mother is hard, especially with no guidelines on how to do it. Somehow, I've managed. I've maintained this life.

Sometimes, I get the feeling that that's going to change. That what I've built will be torn down again. And I dread how it can get torn down.

Once I'm done cleaning up the mess—peanut butter and bananas, I will never understand—I make my way to Fallon's nursery. I don't enter right away, I become an observer. Sam is hunched over her crib. He reaches in, pulling her out, rubbing his face against her. This is the most expression I've seen him have in a long time.

My daughter, the miracle worker.

"Do I have to worry about waking up to an empty crib one day?" I tease. Sam startles, and he grabs Fallon closer in case he drops her. I chuckle, and my little brother's face lights up like red Christmas lights. "It was cute, don't stop on my account. By the way, clean your mess up next time. I'm your sister, not your maid."

"Sorry," he apologizes. He glances down at his niece. She's grown more dark hair, and her features are more like Cas. Her eyes right now are blue, but they can still change over. "Guess you got stuck with two kids instead of one."