Benefits

Ch. 35: Madness

Madness- Muse

"I, I can't get these memories out of my mind and some kind of madness is starting to evolve."

---

What hurt most about everything wasn't the fact that Jake ended things, but he forbade Alice from talking to me for a while.

"He said it might get too awkward. You know, you're friends and they're cousins." Casper tried to explain to me why Alice has been dodging me the next day.

"Until everything is cooled off for a while you know?" He paused. "Nothing personal."

After that, he walked off with Alice who seemed deeply upset about this whole thing.

Jake had no right to tell her who to talk to. I couldn't do anything, and I was back to square one.

The nobody.

Alice was my friend before all of the Jake stuff, but it was only by Lauren who made us friends. Now here I am sitting with Lauren as she blathers about Chad fucking her. Reese is no where to be seen, and once again Jake is fucking any girl he wants.

I see the way he looks at the girls. The way he lusts for them, and it frightens me how much it looked similar the way he looked at me.

The judgement could be skewed to the fact that he still wears his glasses, but still his smile is bigger then ever before.

Conrad does hold his compromises, and texts me in the morning, I almost don't respond, but he is such a nice guy, so I let it be. He also asked me if I needed I ride to school, which I said no to. I should have said yes because now all I hear about is Lauren's problems.

And as I lay down in my bed the next night, I feel the recycle of the day before take hold.

Ring

Ring

I frown in my sleep, quickly awoken from my high ring tone by my ear that I so dumbly put right there.

I answer without looking at the caller ID. Too tired to open my eyes." H... hello." I mumble out to the unknown caller.

"Dawn!" Breathy sighs come from the caller, the rasp to there voice is familiar... way too familiar.

"Jake?" Confusion and annoyance filled me.

"I...I -" He is so muffled, frantic in his state shakes me to open my eyes in concern.

"What- I mean, why are you calling me?"

"Sorry." He hangs up after that.

---

When I got into English class, I saw Jake looking as normal as ever. Maybe I dreamt last night? Maybe he called the wrong number? I wasn't going to say anything unless he did.

He didn't. He sat there in his seat quietly, playing with his eraser on his pencil.

Later that night, the same thing happened.

"H...hello?"

"I... uh... sorry."

And the next night.

"Jake?"

"Uhhhh bye."

Each day as I saw him in English, he would appear weirder and weirder. His mannerisms that were normal at first, started to appear different.

Even the next night he called me, and this is when I had enough.

"What the fuck do you want!" I screech into my phone. I liked sleep a lot, and if he kept fucking calling me late in the night; leaving me confused, I think I might go crazy.