Fluorescents

65

" Don't tag me along
       To your show,
          To your broadcast,
               I know
                 Im good at letting go"

The music from one of my mixtapes plays loudly through the bus and I jump in my spot, looking down at my hand as it leans against the play button on the stereo connected to the bus. I curse under my breath and try my best to turn it off but give up and try my best at pretending that I didn't hear them and that my only intentions where to come in here and play music. Maribel steps from behind the curtain and my eyes revert inside, Amy's crumpled up body laying on the ground as she sobs into her hands. I quickly work to shut off the music and open my mouth to speak but stay silent, instantly feeing a slight sensation of guilt from uncovering her in such a vulnerable situation. Yes she has been nothing but a total bitch to me this past month but she's still a human being and so am I. I shut off the music and insinuate that I'm gonna leave.

" It's fine." Amy suddenly mutters from behind the curtain, raising herself and wiping her mascara stained under eyes, the concealer coming off as well as her dark under eyes suddenly making an appearance. " I was just leaving." She clears her throat before making her way towards the door, trying her best to cover her face as she does so.

Once she's gone Maribel groans in her spot and throws herself onto the couch. I stand in my spot and question my choices. I could stay and help her work through her problems or, I could leave. She has been working with Amy this whole time. Who knows if she has anything planned against me. What if this is all a trap? I shake my usual paranoid thoughts from my head and try to rationalize as best as I can. She has been the nicest to me out of the both of them and I have been able to tell that she seems friendly enough. The only real problem was Amy intervening and keeping her from being nice to me.

" Are you ok?" I question, turning around and slowly walking towards the couch, making sure to keep my pace brisk and not in any way threatening. Plus I'm also planning on keeping my space from her incase she chooses to attack.

" Ugh I'm just stressed." She groans from behind her hands, sounding sincere and not attacking me in any way. I nod my head and step closer. She removes her hands from her face and turns to look at me, her dark long hair a mess. I step down to sit next to her and gaze at her melancholic features as she gazes at my own. A piece of her slips in front of her face and I pull it back in place behind her ear, my eyes returning to meet hers for a second before she leans forward in an instant and places her lips on mine. I kiss her back and lean onto her as she leans back, her hair running through mine before I come back to reality and pull away at the unfamiliar and unsuitable feeling. She instantly takes notice and opens her mouth to apologize, an embarrassed look on her features as she rushes her words to speak and apologize. " I'm so sorry- that was so stupid I wasn't thin- "

" It's ok- " I rush my own words, laughing lightly out of embarrassment. Her cheeks flush and I instantly apologize myself. " I'm sorry- it's just I don't-" her eyes widen as I try to explain myself and she practically face palms herself before speaking.

" I'm sorry I didn't know you were straight." She groans leaning back into her hands, a light laugh erupting from my lips at her words. 

" I'm not." I mutter, laughing lightly after. She looks up from her hands and turns to look at me. " Im bi it's just, theres already someone that-" I go on, my mouth speaking for the unjustified guilty feeling resting within me.

" Oh yeah, Derek." She huffs, laughing lightly towards the end. My eyes widen and I nod my head, muttering a yeah as if I actually was thinking of him and not someone else in particular. " I'm sorry about that." She tells me and I brush it off, a smile implanting her lips at my chill response. " It's just, I love her and all and she's my best friend but I've been so exhausted from consoling Amy. " she groans, leaning back into the couch. I nod my head and try not to overstep. " You know Alex?" She asks me my stomach instantly dropping at the mention of the name.