The Winchester Sister (COMPLETED)

Chapter 25

Castiel's POV

I wake up on a strange bed, in an unfamiliar place. I startle for a moment, pulling out the angel blade I keep under my pillow before I realize I'm in Asa's apartment. Our apartment, I guess.

I get up and look in the dresser. I find some clothes, clothes that look my size and match my style. Asa seems to have gotten me more trench coats, same style, but different colors. I now have a black one and a dark brown one to go with my beige one.

I get dressed, going to the bathroom and brushing my teeth and splashing my face with water.

I'm still not used to being human. I feel a piercing pain in my stomach, one that I've gotten used to since I've become human. I'm hungry. I haven't gotten used to eating. It still feels odd, seeing food and wanting to put it in my mouth, chew it up, swallow it. I pick up the food, which the note informs me is bacon and eggs.

The note is from Asaya. I'm getting rather tired of her leaving notes every time she disappears. It always seems to end in something bad.

Dear Castiel,

I've gone out for a walk. I'm trying to find a job, somewhere to work while you're at the Gas 'N Sip. Preferably at a gym somewhere, maybe as an instructor, so I can keep myself in good shape while we lay low.

I left some bacon and eggs for you to eat. It's something that a lot of people have for breakfast. I also packed you a lunch, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, some green beans, and a bottle of water. There's more water in the fridge, make sure you drink that. You're a human now, and humans have this weird thing where if they don't drink water they get dehydrated, and dehydration makes your head hurt in a very unpleasant way. So stay hydrated, Cassie.

Do you know why Dean kicked you out of the bunker? I don't want to tell you over note, because that's tacky, but as soon as we're both home I can tell you all about it.

I swear on my Grace that I'm not being taken anywhere against my will. I promise that everything I said in the first paragraph was true. Just in case you don't believe me. Not that you don't have reason to be doubtful, but, well... I just wanted to make sure you knew I was going to be safe.

Have a good day at work.

Love,

Asaya/Amriel, whatever you want to call me

I eat and do everything I need to as a human, including call Asa to make sure she's okay. I get in my car to drive to work.

It's still an odd feeling to drive. It's just... different to be sitting in the front seat of a car, my hands at the wheel, my control over a vehicle that is not my own body. I feel my eyelids start to droop, and I pinch my arm several times to stay awake.

I'm human. I'm fully, entirely human, endlessly human. I have to eat and sleep and drink water and take showers and get a job to support myself. I have to be human. I don't know how to be a human. I'm still a tad bit awkward around humans, occasionally saying things wrong and receiving odd looks. But mostly I've figured it out. Mostly. It's a work-in-progress.

I do miss being an angel.

I miss my wings, the familiar weight on my back. It's rather comforting. I miss being able to fully tune into angel radio, miss always having a connection to my siblings. I miss being able to teleport myself anywhere, moving quickly and efficiently. I miss Heaven, but not the current Heaven. I miss how Heaven used to be before... before I ruined everything. I miss the angel's Heaven, how it used to be always day, how some of the more playful angels would gather in the square and sing together. I miss when we were all just trying our best to keep the world in order, how some were still hopeful enough to search for God in their rare free time, me included. I miss when I was still innocent. I miss not having the blood of so many angels on my hands, not having a price upon my head with which almost all the angels are hunting me. I miss when I did not have to get tattoos all on my upper body, angel and demon wardings, just to keep myself safe. I miss feeling like more then a speck, miss feeling like an angel, something significant. I miss being an angel.