From Dream to Love (Demi Lovato Fanfic)

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

P.O.V Demi

Olivia was staring at me intently, dying to know what I had to say. I had finally decided to face the truth, I liked her, like girls are suppose to like boys. I bit my bottom lip not knowing how to break it to her. Hope was printed in her gorgeous orbs. She looked so sexy yet so cute at same time. How was that even possible? I was fighting the urge to kiss her again. Just to feel the fireworks explode in my stomach. Just to have that tingly feeling every time her skin touched mine. I wanted to her to hold me and to tell me that everything would be fine even if it would've been a lie. 

-"Demi, you can say it, what ever it is you have to say", she said nervously.

-"I, I can't", I breathed out.

-"Of course you can I promise it'll..", I cut her straight away.

-"No! I mean I can't do us, I just can't Olivia", I said a sickening feeling taking place in the pit of my stomach.

-"What? I don't understand? You said you liked the kiss", she replied looking hurt and confused. I hated doing that to her.

-"I'm sorry", I whispered looking down at my feet.

-"I, I just don't understand!", she stuttered.

-"I don't like you in a romantic way Olivia", I lied looking her straight in the eyes to make a statement. She gasped as the words crossed my lips and squeezed her eyes shut.

-"What does this mean?", she asked her voice shaking. I prayed silently that she wouldn't start crying in front of me. I wouldn't be able to handle it.

-"I think we should stop talking to each other", I said with difficulty.

-"What?", she said her head snapping back up to look at my face. "I care about you! I get it that you're not into girls but I really like you as a person and I don't want to loose you! Your friendship means a lot to me!", she pleaded looking destroyed. I knew I had to hurt her in the worst way possible to keep her away from me. I took a big breath knowing that what I would say next would probably make it impossible for us to ever be together. I was about to be a bitch and I hated myself for that. I looked her straight in the eyes with harsh look on my face.

-"We barely know each other Olivia! I don't know you and you don't know me either! How do I know that you didn't want to be my friend only for my money and fame. Or maybe even to be in X-Factor! How do I know that you're not as fake as everyone else! How do I know that your not just a fucking bitch who just wants to play with my heart! I was just too polite to ever say no to you. I'm sorry if you thought that I cared about you. Now, it would be a lot easier if you would just back off and stop harassing me with your pathetic texts and voice mails! Or else I'll call the police and ask for a restraining order!", I finished harshly as she bursted into tears. Fuck!

-"Screw you Demi! Screw you!", she screamed before slamming the front door of her house shut. As soon as she disappeared I jumped in my car and sped out of her drive way before pulling over a few streets away. I stopped the car and let the tears flow out of my eyes. My heart was in thousands of pieces. This situation looked really bad. I couldn't believe everything that I had said to her, every lie. I was totally falling for her, but it was just impossible for there to be an us. I wanted to tell her that I liked her so badly as much I felt the need to kiss her but I just couldn't. X-Factor judges couldn't have any sort of relationships with contestants, it was against the rules. That wasn't the only reason that I couldn't admit my feelings. If I had just realized that I also liked girls, it meant I needed to find myself and accept who I was. With her right next to me, it would've been impossible. She had to hate me, if I wanted to be able to get over her. Maybe it seemed crazy but now, I wanted the girl's category more than ever before. I needed to be close to her in a way that had nothing to do with our decisions. I wanted it to be mandatory, like we had no other choice than to be together. I wiped the tears that were rolling down my cheeks and tried to steady my breathing. I tried to tell myself that I had done the right thing but it just felt so wrong. I knew that I had a lost a part of myself and I would only get it back if I got her back. I dropped my head on the headrest, fighting the urge to turn the car around and go find her to kiss the life out of her body. I started the car again. I pushed my sunglasses up my nose as I got out of the car walking towards Starbucks. A coffee was much needed right now. The sound of a camera flash made me jerk my head in its direction.