My Unknown Life

Chapter 17

You're right, I’m sorry, I didn't mean to get mad" I jumped off of the cabinet and limped into my bed, I went in my draw and grabbed a wrap for my ankle and a wristband, I’m glad I kept up with all of this. Sam sat on my bed looking down. I wrapped up my ankle tightly and put on my wristband. I probably will need these for a couple of days, depending. 

Me and Sam sat in an uncomfortable silence. I couldn't stand it any longer so I ask "Are you going to hurt me" you can hear the fear in my voice, I don’t know why but I always feel like the wall I built, crumbles when I’m around him, and I can't let that happen, not ever. He looked up and came closer to me, my first instinct was to go closer, for some reason, but I stayed where I was. I looked up to see his beautiful blue eyes, I stared into them not thinking what I was doing. 

He reached up and touched me face, I flinched away a little but it was out of habit. He put his hand down, "I'm sorry”. He looked at me with confusion in his eyes, but he didn't push it, thank god. "To answer your question,'' he begins, " I will never hurt you, mentally or physically, that is one thing I can promise you". "I just need some time to think, think about everything that just happened," I said. He shook his head, and got up. 

He stopped a few steps and turn around, "fuck it" he whispered. I was confused at first and then I felt his lips on mine. I was shocked at first but then I kissed him back

It felt so good, all I can feel is shocks and tingles all over my body. He grabbed my waist and brought me closer to him, I put my fingers through his hair. His hair is so soft, I could play with it all day. I felt the bed on my back before I even knew. I know I have to stop this, my mind tells me to, but my heart tells me to keep kissing him.

His hands went to my shirt and he started pulling it up. That's when it click. I put my hands on his chest and push up, "Sam stop" I choked. I know I did this before, but it was before I knew everything. He got off of me and sat down. I wanted him to continue, but I just couldn't bring myself to do anything. I shouldn't have let him kiss me at first. "I think you should go" I said quietly, I was afraid he didn't hear, but I guess he did.

I turn over and put my face in the pillow, to hide my tears. I don't even know why I'm crying. I heard him going down the stairs. A part of, a big part, wanted him to stay and just hold me, but the other part wanted him to leave. And that part got her wish. I got up and found a sheet to put over my doorway, note to self buy a new door. At least I have something to do tomorrow. 

Sleep didn't come easy for me last night. I stayed up most of the night trying to figure what the hell actually happened. My wrist was killing me, luckily my ankle is better. When I finally went to sleep I had a nightmare that I hadn't had in a while and that just made my night even worse. I got up quarter till seven, with my wrist and ankle I couldn't do my morning workout. Which I really need to do badly, to release stress.

At around seven thirty I got up and went into the kitchen, Cassy was sitting there eating cereal, I hope she doesn't ask me why I didn't cook. I limp to the coffee pot and made me some coffee. "How did you sleep?" Cassy ask. "Like a baby" I said sarcastically. I wanted to tell Cassy what happened yesterday but if I did, she will think I'm crazy. I pour the rest of the coffee in the sink and grabbed my keys and leather jacket. "I'll see you at school"

Sam POV

"So she knows about us" My sister sarah said. "Yep" I replied. I just got home from Claire's house. I wanted to stay, to stay with her, but I know she needs space to think. It killed me when she pushed me away and told me to go, but I can't blame her. I lied to her. And she found out about me in the worst way possible. "Maybe" I started saying, " maybe you can talk to her". I turn to Sarah. " I don't know" Sarah said. "Please" I beg. I hate begging but I need her to talk to Claire. After a minute she shook her head yes. 

I went to my room, but I couldn't sleep. All I saw was Claire's face, the fear in her eyes. I never saw fear in her eyes before, nor sadness, or any emotions. Except anger. She has a wall up, and I want, no, I need to know why. Something happened to her, I can tell, and I'm going to find out.