Alastor's Fading Static Hatred (Radiodust mpreg)

Chapter Forty-Eight: A Talk with Jeff

:XXXXXX's point of view:

I didn't understand. I was supposed to be a girl, right? But why...why did I feel like this? I felt so angry whenever I was referred to as a girl or something similar. My family really couldn't feel my surge of anger whenever I was referred to as a girl because I refused to touch Mercy when they were talking about me.

Am I a boy?

I found myself asking myself that question a lot during the time I was supposed to be napping. I know, I'm only four and my thinking is "supposed" to be less abstract, more like "I'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I'm tired, I need to pee", but I can't help but wonder if something's wrong with me.

I found myself talking to Shadow about this a lot, and Mister Stripes, of course because they were my friends. Shadow would nod and agree with me and Mister Stripes would whisper that I would always be an okay kid if I turned out to be something else. I eventually decided to tell Jeff about this, knowing that he would keep my secrets for me as well as my cat and my shadow would.

"Jeff?" I asked, holding Mister Stripes.

"Yeah, Lou?" He asked with a smile on his face.

"Can we talk alone? Just you and me? Please?" I asked shyly.

"Sure, kiddo, wanna go on a walk in the garden?" Jeff asked.

"Yeah." I agreed, fighting back my nervousness. He took my hand and we left through the front door to the garden as I struggled to keep Mister Stripes from dragging the ground.

"So what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" Jeff asked, sitting against a tree and opening a book to make it look like we weren't having an intense conversation about how I was feeling, true to his nature. I knew he was very aware of Dad's steely, watchful eyes peeking out of the curtains on the second floor, watching us.

"Have you ever felt wrong in your body?" I asked softly, messing with the grass.

"Oh. All the time when I was small. It was only until a few months before you were born that I felt safer in my body." Jeff laughed.

"Really? What do you mean?" I asked.

"I have two scars on my chest from getting my chest flattened. Do you know how Aunt Charlie's chest is shaped?" Jeff asked. I nodded. "Well, that's how a woman's chest is supposed to be. I had a chest like that. It was not very comfortable and I wore a black thing that made my chest extremely flat for longer than I was supposed to at a time." Jeff explained.

"Am I gonna grow a chest like Aunt Charlie's?" I asked, not liking the idea.

"Yes, kiddo. It might not be the most fun thing, but if you do get your chest flattened, you'll have a cool set of battle scars." Jeff laughed. "Wanna see mine?"

I nodded and Jeff unbuttoned his shirt, sliding it off his shoulders so his whole chest was showing. Sure enough, two light pink scars were on his chest and he was so flat.

"Wow..." I said in amazement. "I wanna be like you, you're so cool."

"Trust me, kid, you don't wanna be like me. I am the most passive and stubborn when it comes to doing anything and it's not a good trait." Jeff laughed uncomfortably as he put his shirt back on all the way. "But, do you feel wrong in your body right now, Lou?"

"I feel uncomfortable with how people call me." I admitted slowly, my ears turning red with embarrassment.

"Oh? Do you know how you wanna be called?" Jeff asked.

"Mmmm-mmm. I don't." I sighed.

"Let's try something here, this is purely a test, don't get offended." Jeff said. "Close your eyes, Lou."

I let my eyes fall shut.

"You are a beautiful young woman whose talents in art rival all others' in hell." Jeff started. "How do you feel now, don't hold back."

"I feel like punching someone in the you-know-whats." I growled.

"Okay, how about this: you are a very attractive young person whose talents in the martial arts rivals all others' in hell." Jeff said. "How do you feel now?"

"I still don't like it, but the urge to hit people has gone down significantly." I sighed.

"Alright, last scenario: you are a handsome young man whose talents in sports and fencing rivals all others' here in hell." Jeff said. "How do you feel about that?"

"I'm...happy with it." I said.

"Do you feel like a prince?" Jeff asked.

"I wanna be a prince, but right now I feel like a poor little peasant girl." I mumbled.

"I sympathize. Do you want me to call you a boy from now on?" Jeff asked.

"Only when it's just us, Mister Stripes, and Shadow. And maybe Mercy and Cal and Fae." I said, poking my uncle in the nose.

"Alright. And do you have a preferred name?" Jeff asked.

"Stitches." I said stubbornly.

"Okay, Stitches, I'm happy to have you as my nephew." Jeff said, kissing me on the cheek, causing a smile to grow on my face.

"By the way...does this thing have a name?" I asked.

"Transgender is the word, dude." Jeff replied with a short chuckle.

"Gotta go tell Mercy and Cal. Bye, Jeff! Thanks for the help!" I shouted happily.

"Any time, kid, any time." Jeff laughed as I ran back inside and threw myself into Mercy and Calypso's shared room.

"Oh! Lou, you scared me right out of my wits. What's up?" Mercy asked as Calypso struggled not to cry.

"Guys, I wanna be called Stitches." I said. "And I'm a boy."

Mercy blinked, trying to process what I said before tackling me in a huge hug and knocking me over.

"I'm so proud of you, bro, do you want me to tell Dad and Pops?" Mercy asked.

"No, I'm scared of what they'll do if their "second daughter" tells them that "she's" a boy." I said as Calypso joined the hug.

"Well, we're both proud of you, Stitches." Calypso murmured, giving me a soft smile.

"When do you plan on telling Dad and Pops?" Mercy asked.

"Before I have to go to school the first time." I replied. "It might slip out before then, but it's probably not gonna be for a while."

"Okay, do you want me to see if I can steal some boy clothes for you from the store?" Mercy asked with a mischievous smile.

"Do what you want. I don't care." I said with a laugh. The rest of the day was filled with laughter as we figured out how to make me look more masculine without cutting my hair.