The Choice (a Painful Past)

62

"No. Don't. I don't want some halfass  apology that I can't accept right now. Just shut up and finish being sick, so that I can go to bed." I said.

He sighed, but it was cut in half by the horrible dry heave, that made his entire body seize up. I put my hand on my own stomach, that wanted to heave with him.

"It was the liquor." He moaned, with his head halfway inside the small trash can.

"Yeah, liquor can make you throw up." I replied, shaking my head at the idiocy of his statement.

"No, not that." He replied, before another dry heave hit him.

"Then what?" I asked, watching him carefully, to make sure there was no spillage or anything.

"The liquor made me mad." He replied, stupidly.

"Oh my God." I replied, rolling my eyes. "I'm going to bed. If you still need to finish being sick, then go to the bathroom. I'm tired and worn out, after all of this. Goodnight, Will."

I stood, turned my back to him, then crawled back into my bed. I turned on my side, so that I couldn't see him watching me. I closed my eyes, but I could still feel him sitting on the foot of the bed.

Every now and then, I would hear a retching sound, but it wasn't as often. Eventually, the pressure on the bed lifted, and I heard the door close quietly behind him. That's when I let it all out.

My eyes flooded with tears. Tears for the stress that I had endured, the emotional mess that was left behind, and for the boy that I kept fucking hurting. It felt good for a little while, the crying, but then I just felt dumb and weak.

Who was this person? I wasn't this girl.

Had I changed, like everyone said that I had? Maybe this relationship wasn't the right thing. I didn't plan on falling in love with Will.

He was just a distraction, at the time. Now, here I was, laying my broken heart at his feet. I eventually cried myself to a restless sleep.

The next morning, I woke up with the type of headache that only crying could give you. My nose was stuffed up, and I felt like shit. I wished that it was a hangover, instead of the aftermath of what had happened.

I tried to turn over slowly, to see if Will was still asleep. The bed beside me was empty. I lay there, going over the events that had led up to Will losing his shit. To me losing my shit.

Had I really done that? God, I had never in my life went off on someone like that. I didn't really like it.

I hated to be that way. I remembered the way my entire body had shaken, like it was just vibrating all over. Then I remembered the utter despair that I had felt after Will had walked out.

I didn't even want to get out of bed. I didn't want to have a conversation about it all.

I didn't want to think about it at all, but what choice did I have? I sighed and threw the covers back. My body ached with the leftover remnants of last night.

A hot bath sounded like heaven right then. A shower would end too quickly. I stood, grabbed my phone, and walked to my door, where I listened for any signs of life in the rest of the house.

I heard the TV playing quietly, so I assumed that Will was awake or he had fallen asleep with it on. Well, it didn't matter either way, because I wasn't going to hide in my own house. No matter how much I wanted to, I wanted a bath more.

I eased my door open and padded quietly down the hall to the bathroom. When I turned to lock the door, Will was standing there, blocking it. I gasped and threw my hand over my heart.

"Can you not sneak up on me like that?" I exclaimed, angrily.

He raised his eyes to mine, and my heart broke a little, from the despair that I saw in them.

"Callie." He whispered.

I could already feel the tears threatening to cover my eyes.

"No." I whispered back. "I just want a bath. Please, just let me get a bath. I can't do this right now."

He looked crushed, but he nodded. He held my gaze for another moment, before he stepped towards me. I instinctively backed up.

That seemed to hurt him even more. He didn't say anything, but I could tell from the look in his eyes and the way his entire body just seemed defeated. He sighed heavily.

"I'll make your bath, if you want to go sit in the living room until I'm done. I'll let you know." He said, quietly.

I didn't move for a minute, unsure of what to do.

"Please, Baby." He begged.

I swallowed and nodded, then brushed by him to go sit in the living room. I hadn't even checked my phone yet, this morning, so I decided to do that while I waited. There were so many notifications, I couldn't even sift through them all.

Instagram, FaceBook, texts, and calls. It was overwhelming, and it could only mean one thing. Someone had posted what had happened between Will, Colby, and I.

It was the only explanation. I sighed and checked my texts first. A lot from Sherri, a few more from people that I never talked to, a couple from Kat, Mitch, and Derek, and a mass amount from Colby.

It was going to take ages to text them all back. I deleted the ones from the people that I rarely talked to. The ones that were only wanting the drama.

I texted Mitch and Derek, just to let them know that things had gotten a little out of hand, but nothing serious had happened. I didn't bother with Kat. I was reading Sherri's multiple texts, when Will walked back into the room.

"It's finished." He said, staring at me intently with those sad hazel eyes.

My heart clenched painfully.

"I put in some of those bath beads that you love. The ones that smell really good, and I laid out your towels and your robe."

I locked my phone, stood, and stuck it in my back pocket. "Thanks." I replied, quietly.

When I moved to go around him, he reached and grabbed my wrist. Not hard, not angrily. Just a light wrapping of his fingers around it.

I stopped in my tracks and waited for him to release me.

"Callie...Baby...I'm so sorry." He choked out.

I glanced at him and saw tears in his eyes. My heart broke even more. He was torturing himself.

I wanted to feel happy about that, because he deserved it, but I didn't.